jonathon

Pronounced JON-uh-THON.

An extraordinarily lengthy period of absence from work. So much so that it requires regular dedicated training.

Can also refer to the training itself.

Person a: "Looks like he's doing a jonathon."

Person b: "Nah, he's only had 6 separate periods of absence this quarter. Looks like he's training for a half jonathon."

by Tommy2Jobs January 14, 2020

White Jonathon

When you insert cocaine into your urethra before having sex.

Mark: "Hey you hook up with Angie last night?"
Steve: "Yea man I gave her the White Jonathon"

by Scuba Supreme April 4, 2023

Jonathon Rumble

The greatest man in history. Someone who is better than someone else in every way, and everyone aspires to be like

"Oh he's so cool, he's such a Jonathon Rumble"

by Slice of pizza on toast September 10, 2020

Jonathon

he is a nice ass boy who is hot as fuck. he's cute and all the girls will like him. he will date only one of them when he does all the other girls will get mad.

ALL THE GIRLS: oh, Jonathon is sooo cute, i want to just crawl over him like crazy

by Jonathons Hoes November 11, 2019

Jonathon Atkinson

The wildest dude you’ll ever meet. Hypnotically caucasian, with quite a large nose. Usually plays sports on the low key. Something like soccer or tennis or cheerleading but never football. Quite a large nose, but a good guy. Also quite queer. Not always gay, or trans, depends on the day. Large nose, and a gay persona, overall a good friend. Weird hair though. Head shaped like a triangle.

Man, Jonathon Atkinson was acting really gay last night.

by Amongle_4 March 7, 2024

Jonathon

The person who says "CHECK" after checking someone in a chess match 💀

Jonathon: "Check"
Jacob: "Why did you say that 💀"

by chessplayer1124 May 5, 2023

Jonathon

Basically another word for retard

Tom: “hey 2+2=5!”

Jeff: “are you a Jonathon it’s four you Jonathon”
Tom: “oh”

by Your local neighbor Fred October 14, 2019