Wet match in a dark room

Someone who is so incredibly stupid that only an obscure analogy could describe their low level IQ. Just as a wet match in a dark room is the antithesis of light, an incredibly stupid person is the antithesis of an intellectual.

" Did you hear about that guy that played Russian roulette with a semi-automatic pistol?"

"Yeah, that dude was a wet match in a dark room. What a fucking moron."

by armyowalgreens April 25, 2010

wet dog in a tub

when you try to insert both testicles into your partner's asshole. the phrase is referring to the inability to keep a dog in a bathtub, much like the inability to keep both your balls in their asshole.

krishnan tried to achieve a wet dog in a tub, but it failed.

by joe February 18, 2004

wet fart in a wedding gown

Anything that is vehemently unwanted or unwelcome. Something to be avoided at all cost.

At an AA meeting, an open bar is as welcome as a wet fart in a wedding gown.

by Pipistrello December 26, 2005

sucks hairy wet ass thru a straw

for when u think things can't get any worse . . . .and then they do!

(after a very bad day at work) my job sucks hairy wet ass thru a straw
also see sucks ass thru a straw

by jobsworth February 15, 2005

I have a dream, wet

Progressive plan to move the world forward from leaning towards the anarchy extreme of the liberty spectrum to the tyranny extreme of the spectrum to mould the world closer to the heart's desired order: more democracy, freedom of agreement,

I have a dream, wet: reorganizing the world so everyone is made to be perfectly equal, think correctly, and tolerate everything.

by ever Be Sure January 24, 2013

Wet rag at a waterfall

Completely pointless

Mike: "Jimmy is so useless, it's like throwing a wet rag at a waterfall!"
Bob: "DUDE!! I know! Total ragging."

by jasminedanielle April 16, 2014

wet it up with a stick

When her DM is full of options, but she would rather use a vibrator to get off.

I left that boy on read, and wet it up with a stick

by ChaosR May 13, 2021