praying to the porcelain gods

when you are kneeling over a toilet and puking

after she got sauced, she sucked off every guy at the party and then was praying to the porcelain gods

by david August 12, 2003

porcelain percussion

Porcelain Percussion is the bass sound heard outside a bathroom when the occupant is involved in a rear-end explosion. This event usually results in having to clean the bowl before exiting the facilities.

Cathy: Damn Bob, that was some serious Porcelain Percussion!! It almost smells as bad as my fold jam.

Bob: Thanks...if you would have done that, your toilet muffin would have slapped you in the head.

by Nate and Mike February 19, 2007

poozel

Pipe, instrument to smoke crack, herion, weed, meth or any other substance that needs to be put in a pipe,

Shut up Richard and Put down the poozel.

by fliedshilmpandlice@asianniggas February 2, 2010

Porcelain palsy

The temporary lack of sensation and occasional paralytic effect on the legs as a result of spending too much time on the toilet, usually due to spending a long time on social media or reading a good book.

I made the mistake of throwing down in a meme war on FB while in the bathroom.
After an hour or so, I couldn't stand up because I was a victim of the dreaded porcelain palsy.

by rev. ray July 30, 2016

Porcelain Drips

Taking a shit but only burning drops of liquid feces are expelled. They sting the sphincter so bad that you grab the handicap bars, grimace with pain, clench your teeth and wish someone would shove an ice cube up your ass just to cool it down. If you didn't know better, you'd think hot lava was pouring from your bung.

Carl partied all night and then made a trip to Taco Hell. He suffered the next morning with the porcelain drips.

by Eaton Holgoode March 1, 2017

Porcelain Lasagne

When one enters a public toilet to discover the previous occupant has decided it’s time for some Italian cuisine.

One must recognise when a poo has been left in a toilet, the next logical step is to create a porcelain lasagne.

Recipe:

Meat - Poo
Cheese - Smegma
Béchamel Sauce - Semen

Pasta Sheets - Bog roll

Prep time - User discrepancy

Serves - 4-6
Preheat your oven to 180° C
Reverse Kangaroo - recommended

Holy fuck, someone has started a porcelain lasagne in this toilet, see you soon boys, it’s time for the cheese layer.

by facelymilkington September 15, 2021

painting porcelain

the act of defecating on such a large scale that the interior of a normally white porcelain toilet bowl is rendered an entirely different color, typically brown

"Jim, where are you headed off to in such a hurry?"
"I don't think that oyster burrito agreed with me. I'm pretty sure it's gonna have me painting porcelain."

by triebkore March 16, 2012