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jonathon

Pronounced JON-uh-THON.

An extraordinarily lengthy period of absence from work. So much so that it requires regular dedicated training.

Can also refer to the training itself.
Person a: "Looks like he's doing a jonathon."

Person b: "Nah, he's only had 6 separate periods of absence this quarter. Looks like he's training for a half jonathon."
by Tommy2Jobs January 14, 2020
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Jonathon O’Hare

Jonathon is low key anti-social when it comes to make friends outside the bone section. He brings his switch everywhere to avoid human contact with people other than his three or four friends
Person 1: Who’s that in the corner by himself

Person 2: That’s just Jonathon O’Hare
by Mr. CAMeleon August 24, 2022
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White Jonathon

When you insert cocaine into your urethra before having sex.
Mark: "Hey you hook up with Angie last night?"
Steve: "Yea man I gave her the White Jonathon"
by Scuba Supreme April 4, 2023
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Jonathon Rumble

The greatest man in history. Someone who is better than someone else in every way, and everyone aspires to be like
"Oh he's so cool, he's such a Jonathon Rumble"
by Slice of pizza on toast September 10, 2020
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Jonathon

Jonathon loves AFL and he is very fucking skinny. He is white like a vampire and is super bloody tall. How does anyone get so tall *crying emoji insert here*

He's also gay ;)
"Bro that guy is sooooo skinny and tall!"
"Yea.. He must be a Jonathon"
by Yournanisyadad November 8, 2022
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Jonathon

Tom: “2+2=5” Jeff: “are you a Jonathon it’s 4 “
by Your local neighbor Fred October 14, 2019
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Jonathon

The person who says "CHECK" after checking someone in a chess match 💀
Jonathon: "Check"
Jacob: "Why did you say that 💀"
by chessplayer1124 May 5, 2023
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