Failchild

A child of extreme failure.

A child who doesn't have a life or purpose in life, only to destroy and fuck stuff up.

Steve: (fucking stuff up) Oops, oops, oops, sorry!

Everybody else: Fucking hell Steve stop being such a failchild!

by Failchild Numero Uno February 24, 2011

Infomercial Fail

To fail amazingly badly at a basic or simple task. Infomercials use this kind of exaggerated, highly unlikely failure to demonstrate the nonexistent or dubious "problem" the product in question supposedly solves (i.e. trying to crack an egg into a bowl and instead splattering egg and crushed shell pieces all over everything within three feet, hammering a nail into drywall and sending the hammer right through the wall, eating a sandwich and having its entire contents fall directly into your lap, etc.).

Just full-on infomercial failed at cracking an egg. Twice.

by StromCarlson June 1, 2010

Failometer

1. A method of measuring how badly any person, action or object failed. Ranging from 1-10 (or higher if the person failed horribly).

2. A device used to measure the caliber of a fail.

Scenario 1:
Person A: I sat on a chair and broke it.
Person B: That sucks, but it's only a 6.5 on a failometer.


Scenario 2:
Person A: The movie 300 was historically accurate!
Person B: Anyone have an industrial strength failometer? Mine exploded after reading that.

by Nona Suomy September 25, 2008

Failosophy

An idea or suggestion that is obviously destined to not work or have bad outcome.
(usually not obvious to person who thinks of it)

You: "....I'm so bored... what should we do?"

Your dumbass friend: "Let's play soccer with a bowling ball!"

You:" That is probably the most idiotic failosophy I have ever been mentally injured with."

by ArrogantAngel April 16, 2009

FailCorn

To fail as bad as humanly possible. Worse than epic fail.

"A rock got stuck under the lawn mower, when i went to get it out my hand got sliced off because it was still on."
"FailCorn."

by TCWCKG August 6, 2009

Fail Goose

A Fail Goose is someone who does something so massively lame that they have simply failed at life. They are in turn called a fail goose.

Also, the collective term for a group of people failing together is a flock of fail geese.

This term is becoming popular and is sometimes seen tagged through twitter as #failgoose.

Jean: You spelled together wrong, its spelt T-O-G-E-T-H-R
Bob: OMG, ur such a fail goose.

by djkizza September 19, 2009

Fail Mob

When a flash mob goes horribly wrong.

"That was such a fail mob, they announced what they were going to do before anyone even started dancing."

by Tsahcomplice November 23, 2010