Sperm-troeteldier

"Sperm-troeteldier" (singular) or "Sperm-troeteldiere"(plural) is an Afrikaans - a language spoken in South Africa - collective noun and neologism, that directly translates to "sperm pet/s" in English. It refers to annoying infants/toddlers/children/teenagers, as the concept or idea itself, is derivative of the well-known fact that humanity is the only mammal species in the history of existence that keep their sperms as pets. This quaint little Afrikaans neologism is specifically designated for individuals who really don't like kids, and a very polite (albeit somewhat sarcastically offensive) way to describe those annoying little "knater monsters" (crotch goblins), of your friends and immediate family. This silly little neologism has maximum effect when used in close proximity to a Karen. So, if you don't like kids; this one's for you!

"Jirre, ek moet alweer vandag na my suster se fokken sperm-troeteldiere gaan kyk!"
(Jesus, today I have to go and babysit my sister's fucking sperm pets again!)

"Susan! Kom haal jou sperm-troeteldier, hy het sopas op my nuwe fokken skoene gekots..."
(Susan! Come and fetch your sperm pet, he puked on my new fucking shoes...)

Persoon 1: "Fok, ek haat kinders!"
(Person 1: "Fuck I hate children!"
Persoon 2: "Jy bedoel seker sperm-troeteldiere?!"
(Person 2: "You probably mean sperm pets?!")

by thefriendlysatanist March 20, 2023

sperm danish

Derogatory reference to someone into whom another has ejaculated, often unexpectedly. Counterintuitively, does not refer to an actual danish (for that, see illegal danish ) .

Yeah, I heard he came in her. She's such a sperm danish.

by EleventhHour April 24, 2011

Sperm Whale

When one gets a girl pregnant and 7 months later, once she is well into the third trimester, that same individual has sex with the same girl, pulls out and spaffs on her pregnant belly and then says "hey look, a sperm whale".

He turned to her and asked if he could make her a sperm whale.

by Pregosaurus13 January 2, 2021

sperm coat

1.) a nice healthy load of ejaculate anywhere on a woman after intercourse. Preferably around the chest area

“That chick I pounded last night was so hot I had to pull out and give her a sperm coat all over them giant titties!”

by KoofDillinger August 15, 2021

Sperm

Its you bro
You’re sperm

Friend: hey did you know you’re made out of sperm?
You: oh

by ThatAsianGuy420 December 22, 2022

sperm spit sack

someone who sucks so much >:(

thinks theyre deep
ruins the mood
thinks theyre mature for their age
has a bad meme page
denys being a femboy

very ugly

dead mom

sam/ john/ jason : “ok alicia/estrella :|”
us : “ok sperm spit sack :|”

by sperm spit sack October 7, 2020

Sperm Whale

When you ejaculate into a fat woman and Just after you dip her head into a bowl of water

JOSH: Dude Jane is so fat, I wish I could sperm whale her
MARK: you're A WEIRDO MAN

by NICK NAVK THE PATTIES BACK June 7, 2018