brandon

a 5'5 pubescent kid that has no life. He likes a girl named Ysabelle. All he does is just sit down and plays Fortnite. He has no life.

calvin:
hey, you heard about brandon?

zahn:
ye

calvin:
he likes Ysabelle.

zahn: wow, brandon is a god

calvin:
ye

by brandizzy July 27, 2018

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Brandon

A manipulative, stupid, and dirty fuckboy who’s probably gay.

Bella: Did you guys see Brandon today?

Peter: Yeah! He just fucked some chick in the locker room.
Bella: Wow. What a manwhore.

by PineappleChicken December 30, 2018

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Brandon looks just like Steve Urkel, just a tab bit nerdier. Typically thinks he's a 'gangsta' but is about as scary as a 90 grandma in a wheel chair. He has a good credit score, so you really know he isn't about that life. Brandon usually gets drunk off of 1 drink. Secretly wishes he could come out about his fantasies he has about other men, but his church he regularly attends wouldn't approve. He also has the best assistant at his job (the blonde with big boobs). And yes, assistant at work, he REALLY ISN'T ABOUT THAT LIFE. If you're a girl, don't go searching for Brandon.. He will find you and seek a friendship as tight as unicorns and rainbows. If you're a guy, hide yo junk unless you about day life.

"That 10 year old wanna-be gangster listening to Ludacris is SO BRANDON!"
"My friends call me 'Brandon' now because I have a smoking hot assistant"

by VioletBlueberry June 1, 2017

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