Mind wipe

A phrase that you say to your friends before telling them something so unhinged that you would like them to pretend it was never said

Person 1: "Honestly, guys, mind wipe?"
Person 2 & 3 (in unison): "Of course!"
Person 1: "I recently pretended to be disabled so that I could get out of a sexual assault charge."

by Norman Pretzels July 9, 2025

Mr Wipes

Mr wipes is the guy that goes around the elderly home and well wipes the elderly. It may not be a very classy job but Mr Wipes finds this very satisfying.

Here comes Mr Wipes to the elderly home to do his job.

by Krazez June 6, 2018

Schrodinger’s Wipe

When you’ve taken a shit and don’t need to wipe, but you don’t know that until you’ve wiped. You both needed and didn’t need to wipe.

‘I’ve just had a shit, Kris, followed by a Schrodinger’s Wipe.’

by JimboJdog November 26, 2025

Ghost Wipe

The ability to force your manure out in such precious force squeezing your cheeks as your projectile moves so quick not leaving no trace of evidence

I took a ghost wipe since mom was in a rush

by PreciousToileter April 4, 2022

Wipes

To single-handedly beat out the competition, usually in a definitive fashion. Somewhat interchangeable with "clears" and "solos."

The Dark Knight absolutely wipes The Batman.

by guesswho¿? September 26, 2022

ass wipe

someone who is an actual asshole. who knows, maybe it’s you. asswipe.

god damn Brenda you are such an ass wipe.

by joe Biden’s asshole March 8, 2021

one wipe delight

The euphoric feeling you experience where you go to wipe after taking a shit and you realise after one wipe that there’s nothing to clean down there

“How was your shit this morning?”
“Fantastic! It was a one wipe delight”

by My mama Jefe November 4, 2020