Total Utter Twat

A total utter twat is someone who despite being frequently told that they aren't funny, continue to make shitty jokes about either boring or sensitive subjects.

John- i went for a 3 mile jog yesterday. 2 laps around Mike's mum!
Mike- Yeah thats hilarious. Even funnier the first 30 times you said it.
John- Your mum needs to rub herself in oil to get out of the bath!
Mike- I'm gonna beat the shit out of you, you total utter twat!

by FresherThanAnApple April 14, 2011

twat-sicle

a sexually appealing penis

"Use your twat-sicle and make babies!"

by 1111 August 22, 2006

cum-twat

It strictly defines someone who is ugly, due to there personality and the fact that can be a total a-hole, too.

Man, Jim is a real cum-twat in the morning.

by Evil 1 August 24, 2006

itch twitchy twat

When you cross a bad case of thrush and a one night stand with Billy Ray Cyrus

Patient : I have an Itchy Twitchy Twat
Doctor : I told you to stop seeing Billy when you have thrush

by KiNeTiK August 18, 2004

twat waffle

a derogatory term used to describe any nasty person, especially someone of sorted character.

Christina is certainly a twat waffle. She has the worst disposition and constantly uses people.

by diabloceto July 23, 2007

twat waffle

1. A foolish, inept, or unattractive person. 2. Someone who you find in extreme annoyance.

President Bush is such a twat waffle.

by Priscilla December 13, 2004

twat cop

A regulator who polices the use of someone else's twat.

"Girl, my twat cop going to bust yo head when he find out you been standing on my corner!"

by Baginaria August 10, 2006