Edison Hoang

He’s like from Vietnam or Laos or some shit.

I dunno. Tiny dick and big hands (for all that rice picking 😏).

Friend portrayed by Kalman
Friend 2 portrayed by Avi
Edison portrayed by Edison

Friend: What’s going on with Edison?
Friend 2: He’s having sex with a bowl of pho because he from the Congo and that’s what they do.

Friend: Are you gay for me?
Friend 2: Yeah
Friend: Follow me 😉

End of Act I
—Act II—

Friend 2: I’m sorry. I must go.

Friend: You dick. You can’t leave me as a single mother.

Friend 2: I have a future, Friend. I can’t skip collage just to take care of a baby. I was 14! I wasn’t thinking and the hormones got the best of me.

*baby crying in the distance*
Friend: You bitch. You woke up the baby!
Friend 2: Thank god I won’t have to be here any longer.

*Friend 2 slams front door as Friend breaks down crying like a little piss baby*

End of Act II
—Finale—

Edison: Hey. Long time no see.

Friend 2: How have you been?
Edison: Remember Friend?
Friend 2: Oh god. Don’t get me started 🙄

Edison: Oh well we’re getting married this upcoming month and I wanted to invite you to the weddi-
Friend 2: YOU’RE WHAT?
*Friend 2 flips table and draws a weapon. However, this is no ordinary weapon. It is an authentic 100 pound broadsword*
Edison: Friend 2, put down the broadsword. I’m sorry, I really am.

*Friend 2 runs out of the bar or wherever the fuck he was and goes onto a bridge*
Friend 2: Goodbye cruel world
*Friend 2 jumps off the bridge dramatically*

—Finé—
(That’s fancy people language for “the end”)

Definition:

P: Edison Hong Kong Edison Hoang Bong Kong

by ChineseLatkes July 28, 2021

Flag

Get the Edison Hoang mug.

niall.horans.wifey

one of the most AMAZINGEST most best people ever in the entire world, she’s obsessed with flowers and the colour yellow and she’s just the most lovie dovie person ever. she’s also sza’s and nialls wifey 👀

bro 1: yo who’s that cool ass girl right there
bro 2: only the best person in the world.. niall.horans.wifey

by gggreen July 31, 2021

Flag