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8 Minute Abs

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An uncooperative or physically demanding bowel movement that, once you have finally stood up, feels like you have just completed the most intense ab work out of your life.
I don't work out but I eat so much chili and cabbage that I do my 8 minute abs three times a day. Complete tasty abs, washer-board style!
by CrabAppleSnapple December 15, 2010
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abstinized

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The act of deriving pleasure from sitting around and talking about not having sex but knowing that you will actually grow up to have over 18 billion offspring in your life.
"Hey im from the first baptist church! lets go burn some witches and then get abstenized with each other!"
by Billy Badass April 11, 2005
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1. The point in an evening of drinking where one blacks out from copious amounts of Absolut
2. A time in one's life where their only joy is returning home for more Absolut
1. Jimmy - Dude, was that you running around the party screaming your ass off last night?
Dan - I don't remember man, I hit absolut zero at about 11...

2. George - Is it just me, or has Rob hit absolut zero since he started working as an accountant?
by sumone scary March 6, 2010
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Fart Absorption Ratio

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Fart Absorption Ratio or F.A.R.

The number of farts until an object has absorbed its maximum volume or amount of methane. At such a point the object then begins to release the trapped methane(Farts) whenever it is disturbed. Now this generally only applies to furniture, but can also be applied to other items such as carpet or clothing. In all reality this term applies to any object that can absorb gaseous emissions.
Jimmy new he had pushed the chair past its Fart Absorption Ratio when he could no longer sit down without it emiting past odors. It was now time to buy a new chair.

After maxing out her coats F.A.R. by accidentally farting on it. Kelly wondered if she really wanted to hug Jack.

John gasped for air as his lung reached their Fart Absorption Ratio.
by Captain Ahabs March 13, 2010
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Absquatulate

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Go squat elsewhere.

Remove yourself from my seat.

A command to someone residing in your spot.
Bitch, absquatulate! You're in my seat, go squat over there!
by Sagegrl November 22, 2009
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Stated when the action of texting via the use of a cell phone has compromised your ability to spell words.
Man: Dood, gesss wut?
Bro: What?
Man: 2 mch txtn mx U a b@d spllr.
Bro: I see...
Man: Eye C U 2.
by gawn June 2, 2009
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