The epitome of laziness. Loves to fondle cats and touch their privates. When attacking a Jared, do not go for the head, because it is metal plated, you won’t phase him. Typically looks like they’re lost and walking in circles, but don’t interrupt them, this is how they think, and disturbing them could ruin their entire day.
by NickyRen October 18, 2022

Jared's Ears Is a genetical condition in which somebodies ears are literally ginormous. Some mistake a person with Jared's ears to be a bird or other flying specimen. Jared's ears is normally identified at birth because the ginormous ears are incredibly big at birth, and therefore make labor incredibly hard. Jared's ears only has one cure which is to cut the ears off, or trim them with a rotary sander.
by Christophlak June 18, 2024

jared is the most amazing person in the world. although he would say somethings that are a bit perverted but is actually hilarious because he does it to make people laugh. you will be very lucky to meet or be around Jared mostly because he makes people left and is very loved by others. everywoman is dying to be around him but are very shy to show emotion in anyway.
Jared is a sexy ass beast
by hmahma June 28, 2017

A man who will go till the end for his cheese he loves himself and most men do not love themselves like jared leaving jareds lonesome and depressed
by Katlynjennerhater69er November 24, 2021

A fat Costa Rican bastard who got a shitty ass haircut and hates a lovely boy named Bryan. Nigga Jared thinks he’s rich ($14 an hour makes fat niggas go crazy) he lies about everything except that he has so many hoes. Nigga thinks he’s a thug cause he live in a shitty ass apartment. The biggest city boy s(as in fat asf but he still a city boy) got pepperoni nipples, SpongeBob acne and is a big fan of chaka culture and claims the chaka set. And he is thankful for god given opportunity’s Jared is a good homie and faithful vato and
Margret: Jared is fine ask
Hannah: I’d let him nut inside of me
Margret:…
The hoes: I’d like Jared to fill my holes
Hannah: I’d let him nut inside of me
Margret:…
The hoes: I’d like Jared to fill my holes
by Chester2fine March 10, 2023
