Noble Wanker

Owns a Noble Car. Lives sleeps and breathes Noble. Works away but moved the girlfriend in just to keep an eye on his baby. Removes the steering wheel so nobody can drive it not even himself. Visits the garage daily to smile at his Noble and give it a little polish.

Move in with me babe! You can look after my car when I'm away! Make sure she's safe and sound. I love you but I love the car more or you wouldn't be here...Car sitter! I'm a Noble Wanker!

by Anonanon555 August 11, 2016

Watermelon wanker

A person who rubs his meat to watermelon's

Tedd, do you remember when johnny did that terrific thing that named him a watermelon wanker?

by Zenoxum July 3, 2021

Fashion Wankers

The contemporary fashionista owning their love of fashion and confident enough to be able to laugh at themselves.

The frow was full of fashion wankers.

by TheChicGeek October 1, 2019

wanker kebab

An obnoxious loud person, whom derives fun from other people’s confusion or overpowering them mentally although they may be smarter.

They may also feel they are right even though they are greatly wrong-but continue to gloat

Amy Jo is such a wanker kebab

by Chloebelle February 9, 2018

knuckleball wanker

Someone who reckons they're the next reckoning of Cristiano Ronaldo because they once hit a football that moved a bit in the air

'Salim has started wearing Nike Hypervenoms because he reckons he's good enough to play professional football.'
'What a knuckleball wanker!'

by MaliaMadness2020 July 15, 2016

little wanker

When a midget (Preferrably British) masturbates.

He's so short. He's definitely a little wanker.

by handydan April 23, 2014

Wanker Hands

Dispite sounding offensive the term 'Wanker Hands' is actually a endearing and affectionate phrase commonly used in North West of England to describe someone who has very nice hands.

Me; I see you've got Wanker Hands.
You; Why thank you. I grew them myself.

by the_riveria_kid December 10, 2010