douche convention

The mythical place where guys go to learn how to be douche bags and share tactics of douchebaggery.

"Hey that d-bag kid Austin isn't here today."
"He's probably at a douche convention"

by Pat Owen December 9, 2008

douche wallet

A person inflicted with extreme douchebaggery

That dude is such a complete douche. God, what a douche wallet

by dbaggery26 January 15, 2009

Douche Block

1.An all-out quelling of one's attempt to talk to a lady friend, dealt by an extreme faggot that usually iniates the block with a swift punch to the scrotum. This exceeds the level of a cockblock.

2.A bit of hardened residue left in a douchebag's drainage valve that allows the vaginal excriment to form to or more streams as it slops out.

"Yeah I was making a good conversation with a stocked babe, and then JB runs up out of jealousy and hammers my nutsack. Such a douche block.

*With an educated english accent: "Oy! There seems to be a douche blockage seperating the excriment into these assorted bowls."

by wilynilystoleyourbili March 27, 2009

Douche Credits

Related to karma. People like to believe that when you do something kind and generous you will be rewarded. Similarly, if you've been a real douche (asshole) they believe that karma will cum and thrust his big black dick into your mouth. And CUM again. So what hapens when we get CUM all over our new sweaters without having done anything to deserve it? Thats when you get a douche credit. This means you've already been punished for your future wrongs, so basically a douche credit is a get out of jail free card which you show to karma when you do something bad.

Person A: Fuck dude, why did you just beat the shit out of that helpless grandma and break an egg on that jew's head?
Person B: I have douche credits and I'm gonna use them all! Biatch! Asshole!

(Person B gets hit by a car)
Person A: Fucking idiot.

by That Douche Dude June 22, 2009

douche enabler

Someone who condones, tolerates or encourages douche behavior. Said douche may have other good qualities that cause their enablers to overlook their douchebaggery.

However, this can sometimes lead to the enablers being seen as douches-by-association, and in extreme cases, a douche involved in positive activity can cause such efforts and projects to be seen in a negative, douchey light.

Douche enabler: "Why don't you take it easy on Duke? He's a big sweet Teddy bear!"

Me: "Why do you even wanna be associated with an abusive douchebag? He oughta be ostracized, at least then he wouldn't send new people we meet running for the fucking hills."

by m(A)tt March 4, 2010

Douche Hook

A girl who thinks she is cool, and only hooks up with douche bags.

Hey, there goes kristie
Yeah, she's drunk again looking for a dude, what a douche hook!

by Johnson Johnson Johnson May 31, 2010

Douche Poof

The douchey styling of one's hair into a single poof or point at the front of the head. May be natural, though is often a result of unecessary amounts of hair gel.

Brandon: Jeff, what's with your hair?
Jeff: What? You don't like my douche poof?
Brandon: OH MY GOD YOU TOOL BAG.

by BananaBerger December 7, 2010