Houdini Turd

When your sitting on the toilet for atleast 20 minutes and it feels as if the biggest turd has came out of your rectum; when you get up to wipe there's nothing in the bowl.

After twenty minutes of sitting on the crapper Johnny got up to whip and comes to find nothing there but a Houdini Turd.

by Lueckmans November 8, 2009

lava turds

Liquid shit that is so hot it oozes out of your ass like lava.

After eating the cheese rolls from Taco Bell, MArk had to drop off some serious lava turds.

by snarky1 May 24, 2009

Orphan Turd

A turd that is left behind after you flush the toilet.

Paul glanced back at the toilet to find a stubborn orphan turd still circling the bowl.

by Largetarget May 28, 2018

turd searching

Throwing up in the toilet, with one's head over the bowl as if one was searching for excrement.

Joe: Hey where did Tyler go?

Tom: He's turd searching after trying the hour of power. Give him some time

by Mike LaTorrez January 3, 2013

Mouth Turd

When an intoxicated individual consumes too much food, and then begins to secrete a turd-like substance out the mouth, resulting in a turd shaped vomit. It is often found leaving serious skid marks

It was Chris' mouth turd. Looks like an orange shit.

by bighorse123 February 26, 2011

Compass turd

A compass turd is created when a person Eats two consecutive high fiber meals. The first meal is exceptionally high in protein, and the second laden with fats. The eater then passes both meals in the same defecation. The high fiber content in the compass turd will hold a sturdy log, and the dense protein packed end sinks to the bottom of toilet bowl while the buoyant, fatty pole will float to the surface, leaving the compass turd pointing straight up and down.

The scout master taught the intrepid scouts how to lay a compass turd, along with many tricks and techniques of orientation in wilderness. The scouts who could birth the best fecal compass were granted an ornate and venerable badge denoting their glorious ever-skyward turd

by fullyregressed January 15, 2014

Turd Alchemy

An unproven, purely theoretical construct that the psychological disorder known as Golden Turd Syndrome is based on, which is the idea that one’s shits are “golden” and that one is a human god and therefore can do no wrong and should not be confined by the laws that apply to others.

Turd Alchemy is the underlying irrational and pervasive pseudoscientific delusion responsible for the ongoing deification of Trump and his cronies by so many of today’s Republicans.

by Dr Bunnygirl September 22, 2022