Happy as a monkey fried in clarts

Someone who's really miserable or pissed of, clarts is a word for a wet mud.

He's as Happy as a monkey fried in clarts ain't he.

by Firesword101 April 7, 2025

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Hair monkey

A small gathering of ass-crack hair that's been accidentally twisted into a dreadlock while wiping, using "natural glue."

"Man, I gotta get my girlfriend to trim those hair monkeys down there--every time I wipe I pull on 'em!"

by DidgeDrone November 5, 2023

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Monkeys

Awesome fans of Brooke monk (aka the best creator on the planet)

Those monkeys are so unproblematic

by brookemonk January 20, 2021

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Men who ride Harley's or other cruising type bikes, who wear turtle shell style helmets because they are not driving fast enough to need a full helmet usually. And they ride on a bike that has had custom steering handles installed. The handle bars are usually raised an additional 10 to 12 inches, making the rider appear to be hanging from a monkey bar.

"How bout that turtle shell on a monkey bar, his tiny helmet had huge skulls painted on it and he was barely able to hang onto his monkey bar because it was almost too high..."

by BOSS*bitch June 11, 2015

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