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Jacob Monday

A dude with one leg who will typically attempt to roast you but gets butthurt when you roast him back. Typically makes excuses as to why he can’t work and has to be lazy.
Jacob Monday : You’re a loser with no money

Johnny Tuesday : You literally live off of the government.

Jacob : *cries and rage quits whatever he’s doing*
by The Anon Exposer August 10, 2021
mugGet the Jacob Mondaymug.

Monday Morning Quarterback

A person, usually another’s arrogant boss or supervisor with lackadaisical work ethic. This turd will leave early the previous week because he can. On Monday Morning, they are ready to work more than ever, but just for a few hours, they start criticizing what took place after they left early, then start barking orders for the upcoming week. This person is usually a clown and not taken seriously by people who actually work and is not important enough to report others because he is afraid his lackadaisical work ethic will get him in trouble.
Ahh Monday, cant wait to hear what sergeant doosh has to say about the emergency repair we had to take on Friday. I bet he says it was too costly then disappears for the week. He is such a Monday Morning Quarterback
by Adiggy December 22, 2020
mugGet the Monday Morning Quarterbackmug.

Monday blues

When one has the Monday blues, it means they are tired and stressed to be back at work (or just be back to Monday in general). Everyone has a shared "ugh" state of being.
Do not ask me how I am. It is Monday. You KNOW I have the Monday blues.

I had a rough weekend and now I have the Monday blues. This SUCKS!
by LingDanc803 February 27, 2023
mugGet the Monday bluesmug.

monday morning

person 1: "tomorrow is monday morning"
person 2: "please unalive me :)"
by finn the manly man April 7, 2022
mugGet the monday morningmug.

Matrix Mondays

Definition: Matrix Mondays

An information technology error or incident or series of incidents that occur on any Monday and ultimately disrupts productivity for a valuable period time.

Examples in a sentence:
James: “I can’t seem to integrate calendly to my email calendar and we need to prioritize this immediately.” Matt can you setup your calendly IMAP server now.”

Response: “No way it’s Monday… I’m not starting my week by getting sucked into the vortex of Matrix Mondays!”

“I’ll call them and figure it out myself”

ring ring… please hold while we find an agent for you… 1 hour later… I’m sorry goodbye *click*

History : A term coined by Matt Clarke, COO @ Nuera Capital in 2024.
Last week Matrix Mondays almost got me fired. I had my email server crash and my zoom account suspended without warning because the payment didn’t go through. I couldn’t see my meetings so they were all cancelled and I just wanted to scream:
by UptobeHappy November 26, 2024
mugGet the Matrix Mondaysmug.

motherless monday

the monday after a long weekend of being an idiot, doing dumb shit, or motherless activity.
Joe: Yo how did this weekend go?

Me: It’s definitely a motherless monday, bro. i was at the club catching hella ass and getting drunk as fuck!
by Dream Jackson January 17, 2022
mugGet the motherless mondaymug.

Mondays

Proxy label for referring to a particular group or clique, be it geographic, socio-economic, racial, religious or what have you. Used to facilitate covert bigotry when in public. The group for which Mondays is proxied to is generally known by the audience using/listening to the term.

From joke - "know why group guys are called Mondays?" *why?* "well, no one likes a Monday."
White guys Tad & Chad are drinking, when a group of friends, all black (or brown, Asian, doesn't matter, T&Ch are assholes...) enter the bar. Tad says "Let's finish up before they change the music to all rap and hip hop." Chad replies "Shit, always the same; nobody likes Mondays."
by Hashtagthatsnothowhashtagswork February 14, 2021
mugGet the Mondaysmug.

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