Monday

literally hell on Earth. Monday crushes your dreams and makes you feel helpless. It is the start of the week. Monday makes you want to commit suicide.

Jim: "Tommorrow is Monday!"
Bob: instant depression

by MasonWaller May 10, 2018

Monday bag

When you wake up on Mondays but are too lazy to go out and purchase a condom, so you use a ziplock bag

Hey dude, what was with all the noise last night?

-Sorry man, Jessica and I were having sex

Nice! Did you use a condom?
-Couldn't find one, so I used a monday bag

by Slamthatspam February 14, 2017

Monday

Something really shitty

Man this Tuesday is so monday

by moneymorebish March 8, 2017

Monday

A day where anything and everything bad will happen. Tsunamis will take place. Volcanoes will erupt. Aliens will abduct babies. Your boss will fire you (for no apparent reason).

"My five-year girlfriend broke up with me."
"Damn, man, I'm sorry. When?"
"Monday."
"Of course."

by madeine July 19, 2016

monday week

A week that feels like everyday is Monday.

This week Is so bad it’s a Monday week.

by Cadencecat May 6, 2018

Monday

Garfield's least favorite day.

Garfield: I hate Mondays.
Dave: Do you want be to kill you?

by Webkinz Person 515315151 November 29, 2019

Monday Party

A “Montag Party” is a last minute event that was announced just a day before it takes place and is held on a Monday

Montag Party is a surprisingly dope party and lasts until the early morning hours of the next day

Typically celebrated in shared living arrangements, it needs to piss off at least 50% of the roommates to be a success

Necessary games are beer pong and seven minutes in heaven

Dylan: Yo dude! Do you remember the legendary party at schillhouse?
Max: What party dude
Dylan: Damn boi, this party on a monday
Max: sheesh boyy, THE legendary monday party?? everyone remembers it, this shit was dope!! i wish i’ll be on the guestlist next time

by juliabiala January 19, 2020