convenient child

A child young enough to be deemed "cute" by your peers, who you take multiple photos and upload them to social media, particularly Instagram. They are a means of getting more 'likes' on your photos.

Friend: "You looked like you were having so much fun with your cousin last weekend."
Me: "Nah, he's just a convenient child"

by Slayer96 August 23, 2017

spirit child

A child who you wish to be

“Kirsten’s crazy dancing is what makes her my spirit child”
“Look at her wearing that princess dress - she’s my spirit child”
“Dylan ate a whole tub of ice cream - he’s my spirit child”

by Thisismyname23456 March 12, 2018

boner child

When your mother was impregnated naturally rather than with artificial insemination.

(tick here if you are a boner child).........

by ChildrenOfTheBoner January 15, 2016

Child Support

Something the government keeps forgeting to make unabusable.

Nolan: "I truly hate how easily child support can be abused. It's like legalized misandry. If you're a man, not losing your virginity still does not guarantee safety from this because paternity fraud exists. It is mind-blowing how the government is still ignoring this problem."

Leo: "Bullshit like this is why I'm not planning on getting any bitches, and why I'm avoiding areas where I'm likely to be forced to have sex with a woman."

by MyPseudonymThatsNotMyName September 7, 2022

Child Diddler

Child rapist/molester

That priest is a child diddler, he diddled that young boy

by CHUKUWUEMEKA March 8, 2022

Fatherless Child

Fatherless Child is a child that have no father or grew up without a father.

Friend 1: "Lol look at this Furry!"
Friend 2: "What a Fatherless Child lmao!"

Friend 1: "Oh my fucking god another dream stan!"
Friend 2: "What a Fatherless Child lmao!"

by neverwhere September 19, 2021

child please

"'Child please' is a nice way of saying, 'f*** you!'"
-Chad Ochocinco (AKA Chad Johnson)

T.O.: Chad, you suck at football!
Chad: Child please!

by Child, please! November 15, 2011