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mein neues handy

Ich hab ein neues Handy und das liebe ich so sehr,
ich glaub, ich liebe es so sehr, noch mehr geht gar nicht mehr,
ohne dieses Handy wär mein Alltag ziemlich leer.
Ich glaube sogar, dass mein ganzes Leben sehr schwer wär.

Mein neues Handy macht das Autofahren sehr bequem:
Als Navi hat's ein Voice-Guided-Built-In-3D-System.
Ich frage mich zwar immer noch sehr oft: Wo will ich hin?
Doch mein neues Handy weiß genau, wo ich grad bin.
Weil mein neues Handy auch den Kühlschrank überwacht,
hab ich schon lange keine Einkaufsliste mehr gemacht.
Mein neues Handy weiß genau, wie ich mich gut ernähr,
kennt meinen Vitaminbedarf und sagt, ich sei zu schwer.

Mein neues Handy macht mein Leben zu 'nem Kinderspiel.
Durch dieses Handy ist für mich der Weg allein das Ziel.
Mein neues Handy macht mich zu 'nem völlig neuen Mann,
und es gibt nix, was mein Handy noch nicht kann.

Ich hab ein neues Handy, und das ist ziemlich cool:
Es reguliert den Chlorgehalt in meinem Swimmingpool.
Flexibel ist mein Handy und sparsam ist es auch:
Es kontrolliert im ganzen Haus den Gas- und Stromverbrauch.
Ich setz mein neues Handy auch als Fernbedienung ein.
Die Waschmaschine startet es inzwischen ganz allein.
Mein neues Handy lernt sehr schnell. Ich glaube fest daran,
dass es nach 'nem Software-Update Hemden bügeln kann.
p1: hast du ein neues handy und liebst du es so sehr?

p2: shut the fuck up

p1: mein neues handy :(

p2: shut the fuckity fuck up
by mein neues handy November 30, 2023
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The Hansen Handy

The act of giving yourself a handjob in the school bathroom, and bitching about being caught.
Oh no!! Sam just gave himself the Hansen Handy in the special education bathroom!!
by The wigglecock January 9, 2025
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Related Words

Your so handy! In all CAPS!

Someone who thinks they've got it all figured out and shows their ignorance off in front of others proudly.

A person trying to show off and failing miserably.

A light-hearted and funny way to take your friends or whoever down a peg when their ego's become over inflated.

Getting rewarded for losing (or just barely participating)
Birkenstocks and socks? Now that's*Handy in all CAPS!"

Wow! I can't believe you actually removed all the stickers from that rubik's cube and organized all the color's on each side! Your so handy! In all CAPS!

Handy in all CAPS Moment:
Wow Gretel bread crumbs REALLY?!?!
by RyanMatthewBrown1980 February 23, 2026
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Your so handy! In all CAPS!

Someone who thinks they've got it all figured out and shows their ignorance off in front of others proudly.

A person trying to show off and failing miserably.

A light-hearted and funny way to take your friends or whoever down a peg when their ego's become over inflated.

Getting rewarded for losing (or just barely participating)
Birkenstocks and socks? Now that's*Handy in all CAPS!"

Wow! I can't believe you actually removed all the stickers from that rubik's cube and organized all the color's on each side! Your so handy! In all CAPS!

Handy in all CAPS Moment:
Wow Gretel bread crumbs REALLY?!?!
by RyanMatthewBrown1980 February 23, 2026
mugGet the Your so handy! In all CAPS! mug.

Triple Dick Handstand

Its when a girl does a hand stand on two dicks and has one in her mouth.
by Gruff445 October 1, 2025
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Mr. Rodger's handy

where you receive a hand job while the one giving the hand job wears a puppet on their hand.
Hey Bill how did your date go last night? It was good that chic gave me a Mr. Rodger's handy!
by Steel mill rat July 25, 2019
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Mr. Handy

Some one that is extremely useful doing things. Male. Hands-on task oriented.
Ryan was Mr. Handy in the bathroom today. He got all the towel bars up and the toilet topper!
by BigRDaddy September 24, 2023
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