lampe

a retard, likely from inbred origin

Bob was being a lampe when he drove his car into a telephone pole

by sir rod July 8, 2010

lamp

hi is a lamp

my lamp is gay

by jkbot5 May 15, 2018

The Lamp

When a guy convinces a girl (usually a familiar sex partner) who is menstruating, to lay/sit down and start masturbating. Whilst she is doing this the guy turns off all the lights and closes the blinds, then shines a torch or 'lamp' (anything bright) and focus' the light on her vagina whilst blood proceeds to come out due to the masturbation. At this point it is customary for the guy to yell out: (with one fist pumping the air) "CAAAAAAAARN THE LAMP!"

Mate 1 - "Oh boys, my missus was having a really heavy period yesterday, so I got my torch and started treating myself to a ... yep, you got it - CAAAAAAAAARN THE LAMP!"

Mate 2 - "You sick bastard, I hope you put a tarp down this time... CAAAAAAAAAAAARN THE LAMP!"

by Norm M August 8, 2011

Lamp

The thing in the corner of your room that stands there looking ugly

Random white guy: "Where the hell did you get that ugly ass lamp?"
Another white guy but emo: " my dead grandma gave it to me!"
Random white guy: "L, RATIO, BOZO, LOL, GET GOOD, SMOKING THAT GRANNY PACK"

by Ihatelamps October 20, 2022

to be lamped

to be lamped is when it is your turn to host a party

you house is the lamp, therefore everybody else is a moth

"Who's house next?" "Dylan says Keagan is the next to be lamped."

by coolio16 November 5, 2018

Lamp

English slang with a similar meaning to simp. However, a lamp, instead of doing nice things to who they lamp on for attention, do things to harm that person verbally or emotionally in order to fuel their lampy (and most likely horny) attitudes towards the person they are obsessing over.

Eddy: “Have you seen Terry? He’s been lamping on Suzie for weeks now. We should probably help.”
Luke: “Yeah he’s such a lamp. We should tell him to stop.”

by Pepsi Needs IRN BRU November 30, 2020

LAMP

Short for: Look At My Penis

A person who thinks that having an expensive car, being buff, and knowing about guns will make people think that he has a large penis, when in fact they have a very small penis.

Featured on a PSA from the popular DeadpoolAndFriends Youtube channel.

Guy 1: Check out my awesome Hummer! It's so badass. It's like fifty times cooler than your car!

Guy 2: Dude, you're such a LAMP. We all know you have a tiny penis, so stop showing off your damn car.

by WadeWilson April 29, 2010