A very powerful man, one so powerful he beats his three wives for fun. Has hair the likes one has never seen; it resembles matted down beaver hair that never moves, even when fighting on top of a train or running around in the Alaskan wilderness. Currently weighing in at a cool 400 pounds, he doesn't have to actually fight anymore, just wave his hands and all have broken necks or arms. He dresses to kill in all black, which does not hide his bulky ass. No acting skills are required; all that is needed is to have a dick in your throat and be able to mumble "Mission Accomplished". In order to kill like Seagal, you must be able to slide for 20 minutes without a running start and shoot your enemies at the same time, even on the flatest of surfaces. (No reloading is required, your ammo is endless).
Every movie is made with his character having the name "John", "Jack", or "Casey". In order to write a plot for a Seagal movie, all you must do is have him a) be a cop, b) a mercenary or c) an ex-serviceman. Then Seagal must either save a sub, a town, a nuclear warhead, the environment, or all of the above. He must do battle with Columbian druglords, terrorists, or environmental evildoers. Then Seagal ultimately saves the day, and ends the movie with a snazzy one-liner. While the credits are rolling, you could have him strumming one of his guitars, and singing a jaunty little number.
Every movie is made with his character having the name "John", "Jack", or "Casey". In order to write a plot for a Seagal movie, all you must do is have him a) be a cop, b) a mercenary or c) an ex-serviceman. Then Seagal must either save a sub, a town, a nuclear warhead, the environment, or all of the above. He must do battle with Columbian druglords, terrorists, or environmental evildoers. Then Seagal ultimately saves the day, and ends the movie with a snazzy one-liner. While the credits are rolling, you could have him strumming one of his guitars, and singing a jaunty little number.
I totally Steven Seagalled that guy; Mission Accomplished.
I am Steven Seagal...someone has to take out the garbage.
I tried it with my girlfriend, she said "mission accomplished, all the way in".
I am Steven Seagal...someone has to take out the garbage.
I tried it with my girlfriend, she said "mission accomplished, all the way in".
by Mandy Broad September 22, 2007
Get the Steven Seagal mug.While having sex on a beach, you remove your weiner and dip it in the sand. Then you reinsert. The result is a screaming seagull.
by Rawdog Rich September 1, 2008
Get the screaming seagull mug.A group on ROBLOX that bypasses audios, and are the first people to successfully make a 64 track. Very intelligent people
by zyzrmafia September 28, 2019
Get the Seagull Gang mug.A fart that lingers well past the normal life span of an average flatulence. It's nonstop attempts to penetrate the nostrils resembles the annoying persistence of a seagull.
by AweBeyCon September 6, 2012
Get the Stinky seagull mug.sea based regret. this word was first born in 1886 when i lost a monkey in a tragic bin related incident when i was a young lad upon a pirates ship, working as a temp.
by marcus clarke May 28, 2004
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1. to grow one's hair out and tie it into an oily pony tail.
2. to use a pool ball as a weapon in a bar fight.
2. to use a pool ball as a weapon in a bar fight.
1. "Did you see Spencer's hair? He really went Full Seagal"
2. "Wow, did you see what Candace did at that bar fight? She went Full Seagal on those guys!"
2. "Wow, did you see what Candace did at that bar fight? She went Full Seagal on those guys!"
by LaunchPadMcQuack69 February 18, 2015
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