Land ho!

A shit that is so large that it emerges from the toilet water like a mid-oceanic island.

Jim - Hey Jackson! The dump I just took is so long it's sticking outta water!
Jackson - *looks in toilet* "LAND HO!"

by Eroticturdburglar June 23, 2017

land of the stupids

A phrase used to describe working with or spending time with idiots.

Oh great...it's Monday...off to the Land of the Stupids.

by irishtrish February 1, 2010

land fart

When you're driving through an area that smells like someone ripped a giant one and you can't even roll down the windows to save yourself! You're stuck driving with your nose crinkled up & trying to breath into your shirt.

I drove through a land fart yesterday on my way to the office . I couldn't escape the smell for miles & it totally ruined my morning commute!

by ChickyOh January 14, 2016

land pirate

Firemen- They drive around in the big red pirate ships to pilage and plunder inside of your house while putting out the fire. thanks for putting out the fire, where is grandmothers pearls?

Here come the land pirates arrrr! hide your wallet!

by hellgatepiratehater November 21, 2009

Land Monster Slayer

A person who engages in sexual activity with an unattractive female on a regular basis. A land monster is an unattractive female that resembles a prehistoric beast that somehow managed to make it on land and find a way to a party.

Frat Guy 1: "Dude, Max hooked up with another fat girl last night. He does that everytime he gets drunk!"
Frat Guy 2: "Good for him. He's definitely a Land Monster Slayer."

by Land Monster Slayer May 17, 2006

land lubbers

Those who arn't pirates and live on the land. Arghh!

Avast, ye land lubbers! We come to pillage your town, drink your rum, and chase your women!

by The Don November 13, 2004

Land Manatee

An incredibly fat person. In particular, a Land Manatee has little in the way of recognizable skeletal structure. Rolls of fat disguish the neck, as well as much of the arms and legs.

Unlike the real Manatee which arguably faces the threat of extinction, the Land Manatee enjoys ever growing numbers thanks to North America's penchant for fatty food and over eating. The Land Manatee faces no natural predators and lives primarily off fast food and frozen TV dinners, though they are also known to eat vast quantities of pretty much everything.

Burger King Employee: "Our deeper fryer is empty! I mean the grease is completely gone, sucked dry."

Manager: "Land Manatees....Get the harpoon gun, they can't have gone far."

by Phineas Gage December 20, 2006