grab your ass with both hands

To take control of your situation.

Imagine you are stuck and would push ahead with your hands. Now imagine you are grabbing your ass with both hands to push yourself along.

Or grabbing your ass with both hands to lift yourself out of a problem.

Similar to pulling yourself up by your bootstraps, except more evocative.

My crisis-prone neighbor was whining about her latest self-inflicted fiasco.

I told her "grab your ass with both hands" and went out for a beer with my friends.

by Billy Nichols November 14, 2011

Handsome Jack

A name given to a god damn hero. Handsome Jacks usually own ponies made of diamond called Butt Stallions.

He is such a Handsome Jack.

by SoulSlayer2015 March 1, 2017

catch these hands

Term/phrase meaning to fight, or initiating an ass whoopn!

Say bro! you don't want catch these hands!

by bigdaddyham July 22, 2014

Grabby Hands

A silent motion made mostly by toddlers to show that they want something.

Baby Abigail made grabby hands at her mother, showing that she wanted to be picked up.

by Kai_12345 February 14, 2017

Paper hands

Those fucking dumbasses who cannot hold the line and die poor

Karen: this stock will fall Monday! I am selling now!
Average Joe: Hooooold! Put down those paper hands!

by Zhu_gu January 29, 2021

Handshakes with Snakes

Verb: (ˈhan(d)ˌSHāk/,wiTH/snāk-S/) Orig: Victorian England c. 1535(AD)

Slang verbiage, historically meaning "clandestine hand-jobs with strangers".

Modernly, it is used in conjunction with, or to replace the verb "fap" or "fapping" in groups(strangers or otherwise).

Meet up with dudes like Allen or Ed, on Tuesdays in the park, for handshakes with snakes! Satisfaction guaranteed! Never be bothered due to the anonymous nature!

#fap #fapping #dickjokes #selfiecentered

#buffalobill
#snakecharmer
#mongooseit
#shakethesnake #righthandonly

#mansworld
#feelthefap
#handshakeswithsnakes
#micdrop
#outsnakeyou
#secretsnake
#hideAsnake
self centered
handshakes with snakes
puts the lotion on the skin

by HotDawg Hallway June 15, 2016

National hold hands day

On April 13th, it is a day where anyone can hold hands with whomever they would like.

Hey, today is national hold hands day

by WhiteChocolate4820 May 25, 2018