Hand Job

When you make a contract on a hand shake and the other party breaches and fails to perform
On a handshake I agreed to fix my girlfriends car and she agreed to by me dinner, instead she gave me a hand job.
by Caveat Emptor August 08, 2013
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Hand Job

Never accept this. Use something the guy can't use on himself. Blow jobs are the minimum.
Why give me a hand job when I have way more practice at it than you
by sutf November 21, 2011
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hand job

i like to give timmy a hand job... says robbie
by vartansgal October 12, 2003
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hand job

when some one else Masterbates you for you
'its impossible for an infantophile to get a hand job without straying well away from their tastes'

'why are you telling me this just before I walk down the aisle to get married granddad?'

ways to expose your glans disappointing 3rd date things to do with someone else's hand masseur Bob Dylan
by Natalie Blortman January 05, 2014
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Hand Job

I went into the spa and asked for a hand job. They sat me down at a table and the technician across from me buffed my nails, trimmed my cuticles, and massaged lotion into my hands. It was a relaxing experience and I left satisfied.
by Grammy in the Red House January 17, 2010
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hand job

(n) a derogatory word that can be substituted for any other derogatory word.

synonyms: asshole, douchebag, faggot, tool, dumbass...etc.
-"hey, look at that dude trying to pick up the chick over there."

-"wow, what a hand job."
by Na + H20 -> H2 + NaOH February 04, 2010
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Abby's Hand Job Hand

A hand job that is excruciatingly painful and is always given by an elegant girl. Often, the girl mistakes the male's squirms and cries of pain to be of pleasure. As a result, the girl's hands squeeze tighter. In origins, the ancient Mesopotamian name "Abby," was given to those of great power and beauty.
Derek: ahhh....ughhh....aaGGHHGHHH!

Abby: Harder? Okay!

Derek: ..ARRGGGNNNNHNLARIFAFIAFIIGGHHH..AHHH! AHHHGGHH ABBY'S HAND JOB HAND!! AGHHHHHHH!

Abby: What? Use both hands?

Derek: RAHGAHGHRGRHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHAGH!
by jayissohardcoreheisonfire December 05, 2010
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