liquid assets

Any type of alcohol (especially beer and liquor). This term is typically used in social contexts--but definitely not at a highbrow cocktail party. Use this term when you don't want to be blatant about your alcohol consumption (in front of parents, grown-ups, etc) or when you just want to sound fratty.

Teenage kid #1: Hey, dude, are we set for the party tonight?
Kid #2: Yeah, don't worry. My big brother already picked up the liquid assets for us.
Kid #1: Sweet. Thanks.

by urbanite2 May 31, 2010

assetato

it means that you have a potato in your ass that was just pulled out

yo man check this assetato out i got it from your mom

by m0n3ym1k3y October 28, 2006

civil asset forfeiture

a system by which American authorities can legally seize your property if they suspect that it was used to make or sell drugs, or bought with drug money.
They don't have to prove anything, or have a warrant. They only need probable cause, which can be given by a drug dog scam. You may or not be charged with a crime, and you might never get your stuff back.

Ethel Hylton: "Why are you taking my money?"

Cop: "Civil Asset Forfeiture, ma'am. (Google it.) The dog smells drugs on your cash, so we're taking it all."

Ethel Hylton: "But I've never even touched any drugs."

Cop: "No, but your money has."

Ethel Hylton: "I'm innocent! I've done nothing wrong"

Cop: Relax, nobody's accusing you of anything. We're just taking your money. Forever."

Ethel Hylton: "wha...?"

by pseudoanonymous July 4, 2009

asskite

A light framework covered with cloth, plastic, or paper, designed to be flown in the wind at the end of a long string, which is held between the buttocks of a man or woman. Holding the string in any other manner renders it merely a kite.

It's a nice day. I think I'll head down to the beach and fly an asskite. With my ass.

by Bilbo March 16, 2004

Ditch the Ass, Sieze the Assets

A womens plan when divorcing a man. Usually a man who had it coming.

You: Hows your husband?

Friend: Oh that jackass? I'm divorcing him.

You: Yea ditch the ass, sieze the assets.

by doubletrouble22 September 25, 2009

asset

when your ass is your best attribute, this could also happen by default if your chest is as flat as a wall

erika is very flat but has a large asset so its all good.

by tman March 30, 2005

hot assets

Ingredients of a Homemade chocolate pie or Section 751 Assets or Tax Bitches Butts.

Chocolate, Unrealized Recievables, Butts

by Bruce April 5, 2005