Lamo Wanker

It's a male with a limp dick

i couldn't have sex last night cuz my boyfriend has a lamo wanker.

by Terra K. March 30, 2007

Wankers Wind

When the wind is strong enough to shake the sides of a tent so violently that one can masturbate as loudly as one wishes and the other person or persons sharing the tent cannot hear you because of the noise. This term was coined by British Servicemen serving in Afghanistan in 2006 where such a wind became vital to morale before iPods were commonplace.

Happy days tonight mate.
why?
Well the wind is above 25 knots so we have a wankers wind.
Great let's race back to the tent so we can all masturbate furiously without the embarrassment of people knowing, well they will know because it is a wankers wind and they will all be doing it but they won't be able to hear so it's all good.

by Lungeman October 31, 2011

Ticket Wanker

A person that buys concert tickets and sells them on eBay for more than face value in order to make profit off other peoples misfortunes!

George: "This guy is selling Kings of Leon tickets for £200 each!!

Flash: "God damn it, what a ticket wanker"

by FL455H November 7, 2010

arch-wanker

To reach heights well above the ordinary wanker. In analogy to arch-bishop.A British word.

Steve was an arch-wanker by anybodies standards.

by Tom_NZ April 5, 2007

wanker mobile

A regular car that has been modified in the attempt to make it look like a sports car. Often has windows darkened with black see through sticky back plastic, an exhaust you could put your head in and more often than not has a huge bass music system in it that requires a small powerstation to run.

Look at that chav in his clio wanker mobile

by Wonky December 14, 2008

Corsa Wanker

When an individual becomes obsessed with Vauxhalls Corsas', using them in conversations, status updates and bringing them up wherever possible. In extreme cases, individuals have been known to develop sexual relationships with their Corsas', sometimes naming them 'Lucy' etc.

Did you hear Zac just passed his test and his mum bought him a car? Yeah, he's already turned into an absolute Corsa Wanker.

by ZacIsMyNemisis July 14, 2014

ambi-wanker

Someone who nobs both of their hands.

(Originator- Steve Mansfield)

That man just played a guitar solo on both a left-handed and a right-handed guitar! What an ambi-wanker! I have never witnessed such ambi-wankery at close quarters!

by Tom John December 12, 2004