Speed Helmet 

To get head in a very fast manner

Dan: Hey how was Happy Feet last night? I heared you only had like two minutes.
Matt: All i have to say is that "the whale" gives very good Speed Helmet

Speed Helmet by mx, dp October 5, 2007

speed post 

A topic, thread, or other group of messages on the interwebs where the object is to try to be the first to post and get it as fast as possible.

This is a secret speed post topic.

speed post by PiemanXC February 18, 2008

speed denial

Using call blocker to keep someone from reaching you by phone.

She's really been bugging me lately. She called so often I had to put her on speed denial.

speed denial by YahooGuru2u June 11, 2008

speed trudge 

n. the act of emptying one's bowels faster than one would their bladder

1 minute before the show
Speed Trudger: Taco Bell might not have been the smartest meal before the concert, but it's nothing a speed trudge can't fix!
24 seconds before the show
ST: Made it!

speed trudge by facespacer August 24, 2008

Speed wipe 

Another Name For Toilet Paper

Guy 1: (Gets to end of roll) We need some more speed wipe

Speed wipe by john_doe 123456 July 9, 2009

Speed baser 

Someone who has a "drug problem" who tends to speed down the street , going either forwards or backwards to make it to there most prized palace (the dealers house) , in order to get there drugs.
Speed basers tend to hit anything and everything in there path, including nearby mailboxes, children and even fellow speed based cars.

Teresa:Hey man im about a mile away , which means ill be there in 4 seconds flat
Dboy:say what!? that means your being a speed baser, chill the fuck out!

Speed baser by FUCKKKKKKKKK November 13, 2009

Speed Wiping 

Wiping your ass so fast so that you finish quickly.
Often makes your anus bleed or give it a rash.

Guy outside stall: "Dude, hurry up!"
Guy inside stall: "Okay, I'm going to start speed wiping, then!"

Speed Wiping by TheDudeWhoMadeThis April 14, 2010