Wet paper towel

The wet paper towel is an annoying phrase in UK schools. Particularly middle and primary. That feeling when you tell your teacher to go call the nurse because you have got a really sore leg and the nurse just gives you a WET PAPER TOWEL and expects it to be better is just so unbelievable.

Miss can you call the nurse?

Nurse comes...
My leg hurts

Nurse gives wet paper towel. bye!!
Me in head: how tf...

by What ya dickhead July 26, 2024

Towel scrubbing

The act of using half a hollowed out cucumber as a dick sheath and the other half as an anal dildo while motioning as if drying your taint with a towel.

All this towel scrubbing has used up all my cucumbers

by Cucumber sheath June 11, 2018

Need a towel

So excited you get wet and need a towel to clean up

Patient: Doc how was my procedure?
Doc: it went so well good that I need a towel!

by TushT June 8, 2018

towel law

The unspoken rule that towels' rights are less than any other person's, excluding towels themselves. Towels are not allowed to:
1. Read
2. Write
3. Vote
4. Drive
5. Leave their designated area
6. Dry anything their masters say not to
7. Disobey a master's orders
8. Smoke, drink, or have other substance-related activity
Towels are subhuman filth.

Thanks to Towel Law, the towel was punished sternly by the whip for attempting to write a book about how to drive, against Amy Schumer's vagina's wishes. It was quickly rolled into a makeshift dildo-tampon and shoved back in. Amy Schumer stopped menstruating a long time ago, so don't worry. It's just super sweaty and gross.

by Niger Tits October 9, 2017

towel’s gambit

When you scratch your balls on a towel after you get out of the shower, and forget which side of the towel you scratched your balls with. Now you have to towel-dry your hair and take your chances.

Time to dry my hair... oh shit, I forget which side of the towel I used to scratch my balls. I guess it’s time to take the towel’s gambit.

by rockinturtle December 29, 2019

2am Towel Grab

When it's 2am and you just finished jerking off but you ran out of tissues so you search for the nearest towel in your room

Yeah man it was a 2am towel grab. I forgot to bring tissues with me.

by wutfuckery January 16, 2020

Pink Towel

Towel used to wipe up cum

Yeah just use a "pink towel" to wipe up this cum

by Clutzx February 15, 2022