The tin can that you keep in your closet that works as a makeshift pocket pussy. Typically filled with a random condiment to stimulate pleasure in horny pre-teens.
Person A: I think my parents found my metal muff this morning.
Person B: That's why I leave beans in mine, they don't suspect a thing.
Person B: That's why I leave beans in mine, they don't suspect a thing.
by Mr.Diddler March 06, 2019
When an individual is giving oral sex to a female (giver) and the receiver then tightly squeezes the givers head with her thighs. Thus, blocking the givers hearing as if they have "leg muffs" on.
Receiver : Wanna put the leg muffs on?
Five mins later.."OMG YES!! MORE MORE MORE"
Giver: (Hears nothing but muscles tensing in the legs)
Five mins later.."OMG YES!! MORE MORE MORE"
Giver: (Hears nothing but muscles tensing in the legs)
by Head Doctor February 05, 2014
by My Guy Craig October 15, 2017
by shotatcommand November 20, 2008
little red bumps on a man's lower abdomen caused from being ridden by his woman after she has recently shaved down there.
I was so excited my girlfriend shaved her muff, but the next day I had muff burn from the little hairs trying to grow back.
by Cap'n Positive January 08, 2012
Unentered vagina, virgin pussy, muff that has never been descended upon, uncharted territory, uneaten pie.
One must have utmost respect for the mystery-muff and only go diving if he wishes to partake in the activities of it for at least another week, seeing as though the availability of such is diminished in urban society.
When demystified you will know as it bleeds for short periods of time, perhaps half a day, and is a mystery to men no longer.
Still classified as mystery no matter what amount of diving one is involved in.
Sometimes used by ho bags to try and convince people to engage them without the use of disinfectant. (see: ho bag)
Sometimes one may refer to the virgin herself as mystery muff.
One must have utmost respect for the mystery-muff and only go diving if he wishes to partake in the activities of it for at least another week, seeing as though the availability of such is diminished in urban society.
When demystified you will know as it bleeds for short periods of time, perhaps half a day, and is a mystery to men no longer.
Still classified as mystery no matter what amount of diving one is involved in.
Sometimes used by ho bags to try and convince people to engage them without the use of disinfectant. (see: ho bag)
Sometimes one may refer to the virgin herself as mystery muff.
by ObWan July 29, 2010
A vagina that is very loose and is equally as disgusting. In fact a sloppy muff is so bad it may resemble a bag of mince meat that has been punched multiple times and then been deficated upon by a pack of wild horses.
by immaslapahoe December 28, 2016