Holden Hands

Refers to either:

(1) What a starry-eyed bachelor loves doin' wif all da pretty girls whom he meets in Bangor-Brewer's southeastern satellite-town.

(2) A caring-hearted group of community volunteers in said twin-city suburb.

I love helping da less-privileged and physically/emotionally-infirm members of da human race, so I signed up wif Holden Hands. Da work was indeed totally satisfying and rewarding; da only prob was dat whenever I was paired wif one or more cutie-chick volunteers to perform community-assistance tasks, I always wanted to just "cuddle 'n' snuggle" wif said friendly adorable blinky-eyed damsels all day, and so we'd never get any work done --- kinda difficult to do much of anything when a marshmallow-hearted guy is cradling you on his lap, cooingly interlacing his fingers wif yers, and savoringly flexing yer toes and kneading yer arches and heels. Fortunately we were able to brainstorm a solution dat was palatable for all parties --- da lovely ladies smilingly agreed to let me rub their pretty feet during our lunch hours (oh, they loved "holden hands" wif me, too, of course --- da reason dat they were giving me access to just their tootsies during dat period was merely so dat their hands would be free to maneuver their food to their mouths), and then sit wif me after da workday was done for more misty-eyed foot-massages and hand-holding. So my being able to always gleefully look forward to said extremities-sharing delights kept me contented and happy throughout da workday, and thus allowed us all to perform our assigned duties without interruption.

by QuacksO March 1, 2023

Second-hand snap

When someone sends you a snapchat that was also posted on their story

"I know Josh's ass did not just send me a second-hand snap after i sent him a direct one"

by Subsudan February 9, 2017

Hand Johncock

When you write your name with your urine in the snow

If you could just put your Hand Johncock right here…

by linkslice1 June 21, 2024

ranch-hand

A leader who will do anything to accomplish their goals. This is especially the case when it causes the suffering and painful death of people, including their constituents.

(Origin: Operation Ranch Hand)

Hello, I am Commander "Ranch-Hand" Smith. I am best known for pushing one of my privates into the line of fire to use as a distraction to escape.

by PresidentMarena August 9, 2021

Hand jay

A sexual act of pleasuring a penis with a hand. Short for hand job. Relating to H-jay.

My girl wasn't in the mood for much so I asked for an Hand Jay.

by The epistaxis May 1, 2013

National hold hands day

On April 12 you hold hands with your boyfriend/girlfriend

Billy:let’s hold hands
Sussy:k
national hold hands day

by Kisa ghoneit April 11, 2019

A hand full of Peter

a band from the animated american sitcom "Family Guy" consisting of charters Glenn Quagmire and Peter Griffin.

songs include "Credit card debt"
"Alyssa Malano"
"I poop in strange places"

Tristan: What's a hand full of Peter? Another blow job joke on Family Guy?
John Boy: Listen; Glenn Quagmire: Alyssa Malano, i knew yo ware gunna be hut wham jou ware nene.

by Soctor2 September 12, 2017