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internal crabs

A fictional (sexually transmitted disease) that causes extreme discomfort when urinating.

Internal crabs do not exist BUT watch your buddy's face when you tell him he has them.
Man #1: Dude, I boned this chick the other night without a (jimmy) and now it burns like crazy when I (piss).

Man #2: Maybe it's the internal crabs.

Man #1: The what?

Man #2: Maybe she had (crabs). They probably jumped out of your pubes and crawled up into your (dick hole) while you were asleep.

Man #1: You're full of shit!

Man #2: Dude, the internal crabs. I'm telling you. They're trying to chew their way back out of the tip of your dick. That's why your piss burns.

Man#1: Jesus, that skank gave me the internal crabs!

Man #2: Get thee to a doctor, bro. They're fatal.
by vwortboy July 1, 2009
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yard crabs

a slang term for pubic crabs or crab lice
hey you better not be scratching at those yard crabs
by hattricks March 24, 2012
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hub caps

The word "hub" can be abbreviated to "huge ugly bumps" which are found on a woman's areola plus the word "caps" can relate to the little black circles that some women have decorated around the areola because they look like bullet holes.
Guy 1: Man, you see those circles around her areola? Look at the bumps too!
Guy 2: Yeah, she got hub caps.
by Edefiner February 3, 2015
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japs chaps

When a propeller plane passes overhead, just like the kamikaze pilots in world war 2.
Japs Chaps, at 3 o’clock
by pxrider69 October 19, 2017
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Cardinal Crabs

An STD you get from priests.
Every time I was an alter boy, I somehow ended up getting cardinal crabs.
by The Man with No Name November 20, 2017
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Slapstick Chapstick

The act of furiously applying chapstick whenever lips feel remotely dry
Do you have a chapstick? I need to slapstick chapstick!
by Jawjar420 November 8, 2019
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backup chapstick

A side hoe

Someone who is considered a 'spare significant other' if the first one goes away

Say there are three people (A, B, C). A is dating B, but has been putting enough effort into a relationship with C that if A and B breakup, A can be in a relationship with C.
"I heard that Samantha has been leading Ben on even though she's dating Nick."
"Yeah, Ben is her backup chapstick"
by argylesweaters March 10, 2020
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