jackoff all trades

An individual claiming proficiency for every task presenting itself, anywhere. He is neither schooled nor proficient beyond the ability to claim such.

An individual whose continued claims at ability are immediately discounted upon attempt.

"Dave says he'll fix my brakes, file my taxes, upgrade my computer, and save me a bundle! And he's gonna read my fortune, win Lisa back, and get me promoted!"

"Dude, Dave's an divorced, unemployed dog groomer. Don't let him touch your shit... Guy's a jackoff all trades."

by 3sqzper October 26, 2007

jackoff super myster

Is really addicted to masterbating.He/she does it every moment they can and has enough stamina to last all day masterbating without food or water.

Dude You look at porn so much you're a jackoff super myster.

by AfRo SaUcE December 17, 2005

Jackoff with Jesus January

Jackoff with Jesus during January at anytime

“Hey man it’s Jackoff with Jesus January you know”

by Brando🥶 November 6, 2019

Commander Jackoff

Taken from Ensign/Commander Checkov from the original Star Trek. Used to describe someone that masturbates a lot, because Checkov sounded a lot like Jackovv, which is now Jackoff.

Commander Jackoff likes to ride the Blunder Bus!

by Downvoting Victim January 12, 2006

jackoff-a-saurus rex

A male who is an addict to jacking off all the time

OH EM GEE my name is louie naioleari and i am a jackoff-a-saurus rex

by louie naioleari November 5, 2007

Jolly Jackoff January

Perhaps the most supreme successor to Destroy Dick December

Someone: *looks at calendar*
Someone: Dang. Jolly Jackoff January is coming up next!

by r1dfgamez December 28, 2018

Jackoff all trades

An individual claiming proficiency for every task presenting itself, anywhere. He is neither schooled nor proficient beyond the ability to claim such.

An individual whose continued claims at ability are immediately discounted upon attempt.

A play on "Jack of all trades, master of none."

"Dave says he'll fix my brakes, file my taxes, upgrade my computer, and save me a bundle! And he's gonna read my fortune, win Lisa back, and get me promoted!"

"Dude, Dave's a divorced, unemployed dog groomer. Don't let him touch your shit... Guy's a jackoff all trades."

by 3sqzper November 14, 2007