Empire Today

An empire today is the process of getting the ground to shake by dropping carpet

Carpet Installer: Ok lets empire today this ground.

by InterstateDriver January 26, 2019

It Dies Today

Absolutely amazing metalcore band from Buffalo NY. Some of their songs include: Sentiments of You, Deprevity Waltz, A Threnody For Modern Romance..etc

If you like metalcore this is the band to listen too

I slam danced my fucking brains out when It Dies Today played A Threnody For Modern Romance live.

by Geoff January 14, 2005

Not Today Satan

When a evil blood sucking succubus tries to ruin your friends or your life.

When your friend's ex ask you for his new number. Not today Satan

by GreatwhiteClark August 30, 2015

fo today

A term that literally just means for today.

Guy 1: Where we going fo today?
Guy 2: Why are you in my house?

by bruhmoment62 June 09, 2020

today sponge

An awkward form of birth control that involves jamming a small, special sponge up your woman and leaving it there for several hours after sex.

What if you get knocked up?

It's okay, I'm wearing a Today sponge!

by DrZedex February 18, 2014

Not today, Fred

A motto used by protesters who oppose Fred Phelps

Two days after the September 11th attacks, a 19-year old man stood on the street corner facing the church holding up a plywood sign that said "Not today, Fred."

by ninjapuppy February 28, 2010

not today dude

used when someone asks you to do something you don't have time to do. typically used when you are in the middle of planning a large project, or are otherwise really busy.

1st guy: "can you pick up a sanwich for me?"

2nd guy: "not today dude! I've got shit to do!"

by quebert September 13, 2007