Doad Hammer

A monster penis, or a large dildo capable of bringing great orgasm.

Jeff said after being slammed by the Doad Hammer, "I had ben broken like a wildhorse."

by Dong Chung July 17, 2013

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Crab Hammer

When one turns their sexual partner vertical and proceeds to hammer her much like a jack hammer repeatedly until sexual Orgasm is achieved

This chick was a freak

.... I flipped her over and crab hammered her while we both got off

by JHigity December 06, 2019

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Hammer Schmear

A little dollop of thick smegma under the penile foreskin.

She looked so pretty with a bit of my hammer schmear on her upper lip.

I need to wash the hammer schmear a little better. It stinks.

by Dick Onchin October 13, 2020

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Hormel Hammer

Wrapping a piece of wet lunch meat, typical boiled ham, around your penis and masturbating vigorously. Provides a simulated bare back, skin to skin feeling.

My mom went shopping today. Raided the meat drawer in the fridge and busted one out with a hormel hammer.

by Dick Onchin November 22, 2020

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hammer tanked

Extremely drunk. The state of being highly intoxicated after consuming massive amounts of alcohol.

"That bitch is so hammer tanked she might end up with a muddy squirrel tonight."

"Jim was so hammer tanked last night he ate a whole jar of baby teeth."

by Leukocyte December 16, 2008

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