John Michael

A stupid dumbass, thinks he's funny, has no fucking life. Predator. A fucking dickhead that turns girls lesbian within 40 seconds of contact. A sad pathetic little Man, that cannot stand being wrong. An immature dickhead who lives under the delusion that he is funny and that people actually value his presence(incorrect)

John Michael is a fucking dumbass, I hope he gets munted by 4 baboons and never turns up. He uses an alaskin pipeline every night to try and make himself feel better.

by JohnWoodHater March 14, 2025

John Michael

The sweetest boyfriends, you couldn’t ask for a better man. Huge dick’s where it counts, looks like jake gyllenhaal but teaches yoga.

You’re boyfriend is so hot, he’s such a John Michael.

by KyDandi April 2, 2022

Melted John

Someone who is extremely intoxicated (a Glaswegian slang term)

Oaft I’m absolutely melted John

by danie7smith March 6, 2025

John Cronined

When you tell someone whatever they want to hear to get them to settle down or go back to work.

This guy asked me when the job would be done so I " john cronined" him and told him it would be don't today!!!!

by Blazenink September 29, 2022

Long John

The cutest ferret in the world

“Long John stop biting my toes!” “Where’s Long John? Oh he’s in the drawers”

by sxccubxs June 25, 2018

john-karl

my big dick ahh mans he be groaning in my ear like oo oo haa haa!

damn that dick gargantuan, that’s gotta be John-Karl

by Ysbny October 17, 2022

John

While the name itself is quite common and can be quite the euphemism, a true John is a rare breed. The most prized of species will take on spongebob qualities such as a diastema (gap tooth) and amazing work ethic.

Look at that John over there with his Homer Simpson hair, he is the love of my life.

by A&Please me July 10, 2022