jessi slaughter parenting

when parents are couldn't care less what completely absurd things their children do, and do nothing whatsoever to protect/supervise their children.

at the beach, some little girl about 3 or 4 years old went way too deep into the water and almost drowned, no adults were around to help her, "that's some jessi slaughter parenting right there, someone's just letting their kid drown."

jessi slaughter parenting by asdfg_nwp July 22, 2010

Parental Advisory 

Advertising ploy aimed at children and young adults

We should put a parental advisory on our crummy album so it will sell

Parental Advisory by LilSexy April 6, 2004

God parent

Guardians who agree to love and care for the child as their own. A second set of parents if you will. They promise to be there to guide the child and teach them right from wrong, to love and nurture them as their parents would. In the event that the biological parents should both pass away, the godparents agree to accept the child as their own.

We are so thankful Anna has god parents who spend so much time with her.

God parent by Godwilling May 31, 2017

Parent of the year nomination 

An ironic term to describe the complete meltdown of a child in a public space when accompanied by a parent.

Can also describe the looks others give you when either your child freaks out or you do something they disapprove of.

After five minutes of Rachel's tantrum on the floor of the toy section of the department store, Nathan finally put her over her shoulder and bundled her out to the car, his daughter giving him the parent of the year nomination the whole way.

or

Nathan knew he was going to get a few parent of the year nominations for sending Rachel to nursery school with cheese puffs as a snack, but there had been no time to shop.

Parent of the year nomination by Officeslacker January 9, 2008

parenti-pilled 

The universal experience where one is awoken by da GOAT himself. The man, the myth, the legend: Michael Dilfhunter TopG-Parenti. He will tomahawk you in his sleep with the force of your mom going down a waterslide. His master manoeuvres will destroy you.

The mandem celebrate eid the trap still running on christmas day

damn i just got parenti-pilled so hard Big Brother turned pesbian

parenti-pilled by 1800-rechikolateyourmom November 23, 2022

Nintendo Switch Parental Controls

To torture a kid with

Fuck no! My kid can’t use the Switch a lot! Lemme fuckin roast him with Nintendo Switch Parental Controls.

Nintendo Switch Parental Controls by rubberdumber February 12, 2021

parentproof 

Verb. to make object or environment relatively mild and acceptable for contact with parents

Adj. acceptable from parents' point of view

My folks are visiting next weekend - I'd better parentproof my apartment .

"Dude, why would you add your mom as a friend on Facebook? Your profile isn't parentproof."

parentproof by serrastl October 14, 2009