offensive monkey

Someone who is incredibly vulgar, hateful, and spiteful all the time -- for no reason. Typically, an offensive monkey has no idea that people feel this way about them because they are disconnected from reality.

But you gotta be careful around offensive monkeys, because they are crazy and could snap at any moment, without warning, and bite your fingers off and/or tear your face up.

Sam: Can you believe that douche?

Nick: Yeah man, what an offensive monkey.

by Lima Beaners March 8, 2011

Offence-Tantrum

The act of claiming to be offended by an event that did not attack, belittle or demean any group or person. Taking the misguided idea that no one should say anything that might offend another, in an over -the-top nonsensical way.

"Merry Christmas!"
"Don't you mean, Happy Holidays!?"
"Whoa, calm down, didn't mean to send you off on an offence-tantrum now."

by Ryan+Eric October 18, 2015

offerdahl

Also known as a receiver, willing to take but not to give. Cannot comprehend the concept of manners. Tends to look vacant and eats with mouth open. “Offerdahl” translates into Norwegian as “tattooed man” Or “Derelict person ”. Has a liking for onions.

Quick hide your valuables, I smell an Offerdahl with no manners on the horizon.

by Dylangundi69 December 24, 2019

offelia

The most perfect person to ever exist

Some girl: man offelia is so beautiful i wish i was like her
Some guy: man offelia is so beautiful i wish i was like her

by Momlover:) April 4, 2022

non-offensive swears

"Fetch" for "Fuck"
"Gol" (short for 'Golly') for "God"
"Heck", of course.

Mormons are great sources for psuedo-swears. Check out my site for more fake swearing.
http://www.cafepress.com/shamelesshumor/643594

by Shameless Creations July 23, 2008

Counter-offensive

An insult rendered in passing against someone who is not present, usually over a breakfast counter.

Person 1: Does DImmortal realize that his user-name sounds like "Dim Mortal"?
Person 2: That's counter-offensive, yo.

by MyRealNameIsMyPseudonym December 30, 2009

stealth offer rescission

To bring in a huge class of first year associates when there is very little work for them and then layoff over half of them only four months later.

To avoid the appearance of rescinding offers the New York office of Latham & Watkins brought in a massive class of first years even though there was no work for them and then laid off over half of them only four months later.

A young graduate of Harvard Law School lamented his stealth offer rescission and wondered why he hadn't chosen Skadden instead.

by Latham Diaries May 7, 2010