sit on my lap

1; what your male friend or bf might say to you if your acting up. usually a insulting or playful way to say "be quite"
2; sometimes to be taken more literally. commanding a female to sit on the males lap to cause an erection, resulting in the female being punched in the ass by it.

1; bitch- "your annoying me, gtfo"
ass hat- " bitch, sit on my lap"
2; fuck boy- "sit on my lap"
hoe- "okayyy daddy."

by that kind of dad June 2, 2016

German Lap Dance

The act of one defecating and dancing on another partners lap while the recipient is defecating also.

Helga created quite the mess on Arnold while giving him a German Lap Dance.

by B_Rain October 31, 2012

take a lap

when your high school coach tells you to jerk off later

coach- "Practice is over" ,"Everbody take a lap"
Player- "So we jerk off?"
Coach- " bingo!!!!!"

by your mother is at my house July 25, 2011

victory lap

A victory lap involves driving around in order to waste work time while operating a company vehicle. The word has also become associated with wasting time in general, "doing victory laps."Victory laps can be measured in different lengths depending on the amount of time that needs to be wasted.

Driver: Man Nick, we have no work to do and cant clock out for another 45 minutes.

Nick: I suppose we could do a big victory lap around campus.

by John D. Townsend November 18, 2007

Irish Lap Dog

When a girl is blowing you and tells you to look her in her eyes as she makes you cum into her hands, and then hungrily laps up every drop of your spum out of her hands.

Sheeshus-H, Olivia is such a whore... it was our first date and she gave me the ol' Irish Lap Dog!

by onetimer December 9, 2008

victory lap

The act of having unprotected intercourse after finding out one is HIV positive.

"Yeah, sure it sucks, Don. But I took a great victory lap with that broad that lives in the basement."
"Oh..."

by Matthew Volpini November 30, 2006

victory lap

During sexual intercourse, the act of pulling out at the peak of sexual arousal and running around the partner in a circle, spraying a fountain of gism across the ceiling and walls with the objective of covering the partner in the greatest possible amount of ejaculate.

I almost drowned in Dave's semen during his victory lap.

by victorylapper69* February 20, 2009