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Absolute speed

Absolute speed also known as maximum speed is a theory about how anything with mass moves through multiverse spaceat speeds faster than light which constantly increase. Due to lack of friction (because there is no atmosphere), gravity and changes in physics or lack of them this is possible. This theory also tells that everything travels with absolute speed not just light so we can say that everything travels as fast as light (since the speed of light also increases) or faster. Because this speed is constantly increasing we currently can't mesure it since we don't know the entry speed.
That piece of paper travels through the multiverse space at absolute speed.
by Yesverymuch December 18, 2018
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speed shitting

when you take a shit as fast as you can in the 5-10 minuet break between classes
kyle1: bro where tf are you? youre late to class
kyle2: bro ill be there, speed shitting rn,
kyle1: bro i see, need help?
by meme loop December 7, 2020
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half-speed

The the mentally handicapped, and thus often euphoric or hysterical state of mind that follows a night of heavy drinking.
"Sally was definitely on half-speed this morning after Edward 40-hands last night. At Breakfast she almost peed herself laughing when someone pointed out that her shirt was buttoned up incorrectly".
by Jogana Jallenstrom October 29, 2009
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COON SPEED

When someone can run really fast for no reason.
You have Coon Speed bucko!!!
by Master Coonington November 5, 2019
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Chipmunk on Speed

a very small and skinny person who is usually very hyper...(on speed) This person usually stays inside all the time, and enjoys their few waking moments in is the open. That is why this person is so hyper.
That idiot over there is such a Chipmunk on Speed.
by george kliwoski March 29, 2007
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the speed of wood

Simply 1.513258e-008 MPH
He moves at the speed of wood
by Wormm March 13, 2005
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speed of nir

the speed measured from the time you get to meet Nir, until the time you see his penis; is said to be faster than speed of light
the amount of time it took us to be disqualified since we had our awesome dance was faster than the Speed of Nir!!!
by Mr Nir February 20, 2013
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