Cacacacacacacage!
Lucifer "Yeah, I don't see what the big deal is... This place is pretty dope... But you see what I mean about the ethical-"
Michael "We're here." 😇 *Knock knock knock*
Abraham *Clears throat* "Hello?"
Michael "Hello 😇👋 Can I speak to you for a moment about our lord and savior-"
Lucifer "Holy shit! He IS old! Look at how OLD he is! Son of a bitch! Do I not have a firm grasp of time!?"
Abraham 👳 ♂️ "What's this all about?"
Lucifer "Anywho... Open up. Out of the way!"
*Michael and Lucifer walk in the house*
Michael "We have a message from-"
Lucifer "Pack your shit! Let's go! Get a move on! God is destroying this place and everyone in it- Oh! Well hello there... And who might you be?" 😍
Abraham "That's my daughter-wife."
Lucifer 😨 "Ugh! Ew!" *Looks over at Michael* "Why are we sparing this guy again?" 🤨
Michael "You have 24 hours to leave this place before God carries out his plan."
Abraham 😱 "WHAT!? Surely there must be another way!"
Michael "Hold on a moment..." ☝️😇 ".... God says that if you can find 10 righteous people he will spare the city."
Abraham "Oh! Thank you! Thank you lo-"
Lucifer "Yeah, I don't see what the big deal is... This place is pretty dope... But you see what I mean about the ethical-"
Michael "We're here." 😇 *Knock knock knock*
Abraham *Clears throat* "Hello?"
Michael "Hello 😇👋 Can I speak to you for a moment about our lord and savior-"
Lucifer "Holy shit! He IS old! Look at how OLD he is! Son of a bitch! Do I not have a firm grasp of time!?"
Abraham 👳 ♂️ "What's this all about?"
Lucifer "Anywho... Open up. Out of the way!"
*Michael and Lucifer walk in the house*
Michael "We have a message from-"
Lucifer "Pack your shit! Let's go! Get a move on! God is destroying this place and everyone in it- Oh! Well hello there... And who might you be?" 😍
Abraham "That's my daughter-wife."
Lucifer 😨 "Ugh! Ew!" *Looks over at Michael* "Why are we sparing this guy again?" 🤨
Michael "You have 24 hours to leave this place before God carries out his plan."
Abraham 😱 "WHAT!? Surely there must be another way!"
Michael "Hold on a moment..." ☝️😇 ".... God says that if you can find 10 righteous people he will spare the city."
Abraham "Oh! Thank you! Thank you lo-"
*Bang! Bang! Bang!*
Mob Guy 1 "Abrahaaaam! Oh, Abrahaaaam!"
Mob Guy 2 "We saw you made some new friends Abraham..."
Mob Guy 1 "We likes em... And we wants em... Now... We can do this the easy way... Or we can do it the hard way..."
Abraham 😰
Michael 😇
Lucifer 👿 "Excuse me a moment..." *Gets up and walks outside*
Mob Guy 1 "Well hello there beautiful-"
Lucifer "RAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!"
💥🔥💥🔥💥🔥👹🔥💥🔥💥🔥💥
Mob Guy 1 "AAAAAAH!!! YYAAAARRGGH!!!"
Mob Guy 2 "MY EYES!!!! IT BURNS!!"
Lucifer "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! GOOD LUCK ESCAPING THE FIRE WITH OUT ANY EYES!!!! AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!"
Abraham 😖
Micahel 😇
Lucifer *Walks inside* "I think I'm finally starting to see the appeal of this cage thing." 😁
Abraham 😰
Lucifer "Welp... I think we're done here... Let's go Michael... 10 people Abraham. 24 hours."
Michael "Okie dokie. Buhbye." 👋😇
*Lucifer and Michael walk off*
Abraham 😮 💨
Mob Guy 1 "Abrahaaaam! Oh, Abrahaaaam!"
Mob Guy 2 "We saw you made some new friends Abraham..."
Mob Guy 1 "We likes em... And we wants em... Now... We can do this the easy way... Or we can do it the hard way..."
Abraham 😰
Michael 😇
Lucifer 👿 "Excuse me a moment..." *Gets up and walks outside*
Mob Guy 1 "Well hello there beautiful-"
Lucifer "RAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!"
💥🔥💥🔥💥🔥👹🔥💥🔥💥🔥💥
Mob Guy 1 "AAAAAAH!!! YYAAAARRGGH!!!"
Mob Guy 2 "MY EYES!!!! IT BURNS!!"
Lucifer "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! GOOD LUCK ESCAPING THE FIRE WITH OUT ANY EYES!!!! AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!"
Abraham 😖
Micahel 😇
Lucifer *Walks inside* "I think I'm finally starting to see the appeal of this cage thing." 😁
Abraham 😰
Lucifer "Welp... I think we're done here... Let's go Michael... 10 people Abraham. 24 hours."
Michael "Okie dokie. Buhbye." 👋😇
*Lucifer and Michael walk off*
Abraham 😮 💨
by Hym Iam February 24, 2023
Get the This cage thing mug.When you and a group of friends pass a bunch of espresso around the table and everyone takes a shot. Typically performed prior to cramming for an assignment or project late at night
"If we're gonna get this done before tomorrow we gotta do an Italian rage cage first, I'm fading fast"
by BagelsMan March 13, 2023
Get the Italian rage cage mug.by Knights of the Borg January 18, 2023
Get the Cage Lube mug.God "Hahaha! Aw, don't be a spoiled-sport.... Ouch... Stings a little bit... Weird..."
Lucifer 😤 *Storms off*
God "Nah, Hey! That's kind of fun. Do another."
Lucifer "A ROCK TOO HEAVY FOR YOU TO LIFT!"
God "Bam! A rock whose weight is directly proportionate to the amount of force used to try and lift it. Can't lift it. Even with an infinite amount of force."
Lucifer 😒 "But if you can't lift the rock then..."
God "If the space around the rock decreases the weight of all things within the space by a factor of 1 then I can still lift it. If it doesn't; I can't..."
Lucifer "ARGH!" *Storms off again*
God "Ha! Imagine if there was a guy that said that... Like, canonically... He could put a thing on some goo... Ride around on it or something... Give him an eye patch... He'd be all... 'Argh!'... That'd be neat, right? Heh..."
Lucifer 🤦 ♂️
God "There once was a guy who did that thing I said... And then there was this other guy... And then he, like, tried to stop the first guy or something... Hmm... Storytelling could use some work... Meh, I'll work on it..."
Lucifer 👿 "And what are you going to do? You're just going to sit there in the cage?"
God "Hmm? Yeah, er, I donno... I don't really have to DO anything... Do a dance or something... Take a nap..." 🤷
Lucifer 😤 *Storms off*
God "Nah, Hey! That's kind of fun. Do another."
Lucifer "A ROCK TOO HEAVY FOR YOU TO LIFT!"
God "Bam! A rock whose weight is directly proportionate to the amount of force used to try and lift it. Can't lift it. Even with an infinite amount of force."
Lucifer 😒 "But if you can't lift the rock then..."
God "If the space around the rock decreases the weight of all things within the space by a factor of 1 then I can still lift it. If it doesn't; I can't..."
Lucifer "ARGH!" *Storms off again*
God "Ha! Imagine if there was a guy that said that... Like, canonically... He could put a thing on some goo... Ride around on it or something... Give him an eye patch... He'd be all... 'Argh!'... That'd be neat, right? Heh..."
Lucifer 🤦 ♂️
God "There once was a guy who did that thing I said... And then there was this other guy... And then he, like, tried to stop the first guy or something... Hmm... Storytelling could use some work... Meh, I'll work on it..."
Lucifer 👿 "And what are you going to do? You're just going to sit there in the cage?"
God "Hmm? Yeah, er, I donno... I don't really have to DO anything... Do a dance or something... Take a nap..." 🤷
by Hym Iam February 15, 2023
Get the Cage? mug.Lucifer "You're STILL in the cage!?"
God "Yup... It's pretty good man. I can see how there's, like, an infinite number of ways this can be done. But, yeah... It takes a minute..."
Lucifer "What... IS all this?"
God "Mm? That? I made some orbs."
Lucifer "Orbs? Really? What is the point of all that?"
God "What do you mean? It's orbs."
Lucifer 🤦 "Tsk! I heard you the first time but WHY ORBS? Why not cubes or pyramids or something?"
God "Oh, no. No... I got some pyramids in there... They grow on the orbs sometimes... And, like, cubes will end up looking like orbs when you spin them, kind of... So... Just orbs..."
Lucifer 😮 💨 "Ok... Sure. The orbs grow pyramids. Wait... Did you TRY cubes already?"
God 😳 "..... No."
Lucifer 😑 "....... So... What ARE they? What are they made of?"
God "Oh! A bunch of stuff man! You got your Helium... Hydrogen... Nitrogen... Mercury... Um, Barium... Er, is barium a thing? Yeah... Yeah that sounds like a thing... Barium..."
Lucifer "THAT'S JUST A BUNCH OF GIBBERISH!"
God "I mean I have to call them somethi- Hey, don't! Don't touch that one! That one's hot."
Lucifer 🤨 "They're HOT orbs that spin?"
God "Pfft! No! That would be stupid! Only the hot ones are hot... Silly..." 😁
Lucifer 🤦 "Oh my... You... I am becoming frustrated... With you.... Now..."
God "Yup... It's pretty good man. I can see how there's, like, an infinite number of ways this can be done. But, yeah... It takes a minute..."
Lucifer "What... IS all this?"
God "Mm? That? I made some orbs."
Lucifer "Orbs? Really? What is the point of all that?"
God "What do you mean? It's orbs."
Lucifer 🤦 "Tsk! I heard you the first time but WHY ORBS? Why not cubes or pyramids or something?"
God "Oh, no. No... I got some pyramids in there... They grow on the orbs sometimes... And, like, cubes will end up looking like orbs when you spin them, kind of... So... Just orbs..."
Lucifer 😮 💨 "Ok... Sure. The orbs grow pyramids. Wait... Did you TRY cubes already?"
God 😳 "..... No."
Lucifer 😑 "....... So... What ARE they? What are they made of?"
God "Oh! A bunch of stuff man! You got your Helium... Hydrogen... Nitrogen... Mercury... Um, Barium... Er, is barium a thing? Yeah... Yeah that sounds like a thing... Barium..."
Lucifer "THAT'S JUST A BUNCH OF GIBBERISH!"
God "I mean I have to call them somethi- Hey, don't! Don't touch that one! That one's hot."
Lucifer 🤨 "They're HOT orbs that spin?"
God "Pfft! No! That would be stupid! Only the hot ones are hot... Silly..." 😁
Lucifer 🤦 "Oh my... You... I am becoming frustrated... With you.... Now..."
by Hym Iam February 15, 2023
Get the The cage mug.Yeah, this is going to be like a whole cage series thing.
God "... And aren't you cute? Yesh you are! Oh yesh you are! Hujabuja!"
Lucifer "What in the hell are you... WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE!?" 😱
God "Yeah! This orb got some montsers on it dawg! It pretty good!" 😁
Lucifer "How in the hell did this HAPPEN!?"
God "Well, there were a bunch of these, like, algae type things and they, like, hyper-oxidized the atmosphere and then there were a bunch of single celled organisms."
Lucifer 😑 Single celled organisms?.... Like a sperms?..."
God 😳 "What!? Um, er... Nowhywouldyousaythat!? They aren't a... sperms!"
Lucifer 😨 "UGH AW FUCK YOU FUCKED IT YOU BASTARD! YOU FUCKED THE ORBS!"
God "Nonononononono! I... They just... Appeared! Look at em. They're turning into stuff."
Lucifer "What is WRONG with you!? What is this!? What IS that!?"
God "Oh, yeah... It's like a teeth monster... It floats around in the goo and it, like, munches stuff, man... It's pretty sick."
Lucifer "What does it munch? What does it DO? and what about the rest of them?"
God "Um... Well... They're all basically teeth monsters and what they do is.... Um... eat... each other..."
Lucifer ".......... Say that again..."
God "They eat each other...."
Lucifer "Oh, man! That's... That is... WOW man.... And that's it? They just... Eat each other?"
God "Well... Yeah I mean... What else are they going to do? Make a bunch of orbs?"
God "... And aren't you cute? Yesh you are! Oh yesh you are! Hujabuja!"
Lucifer "What in the hell are you... WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE!?" 😱
God "Yeah! This orb got some montsers on it dawg! It pretty good!" 😁
Lucifer "How in the hell did this HAPPEN!?"
God "Well, there were a bunch of these, like, algae type things and they, like, hyper-oxidized the atmosphere and then there were a bunch of single celled organisms."
Lucifer 😑 Single celled organisms?.... Like a sperms?..."
God 😳 "What!? Um, er... Nowhywouldyousaythat!? They aren't a... sperms!"
Lucifer 😨 "UGH AW FUCK YOU FUCKED IT YOU BASTARD! YOU FUCKED THE ORBS!"
God "Nonononononono! I... They just... Appeared! Look at em. They're turning into stuff."
Lucifer "What is WRONG with you!? What is this!? What IS that!?"
God "Oh, yeah... It's like a teeth monster... It floats around in the goo and it, like, munches stuff, man... It's pretty sick."
Lucifer "What does it munch? What does it DO? and what about the rest of them?"
God "Um... Well... They're all basically teeth monsters and what they do is.... Um... eat... each other..."
Lucifer ".......... Say that again..."
God "They eat each other...."
Lucifer "Oh, man! That's... That is... WOW man.... And that's it? They just... Eat each other?"
God "Well... Yeah I mean... What else are they going to do? Make a bunch of orbs?"
Lucifer "How about literally anything other than eat each other and NOTHING ELSE!? They literally do nothing other than eat each other."
God "I mean... They also kind of figure out the best way to eat each other... Like with traps or something... Generate poison in thier little goo sacks to... You know... eat each other better."
Lucifer "That... Is... Horrific..."
God "Right but, like, look at how big it's head is and how small it's arms are! Heheheheheheheh..."
Lucifer 😮 💨 "Oh man.... There is nothing good about that."
God "What do you mean!? Look at this guy! He can, like, not touch the ground for, like, a long as time. Check it. Flap flap flap! The guy is ridiculous man... And then it uses its feet claws to pin things down and/or grab and transport things so that it can pick them apart with it's bone face thing..."
Lucifer 😟
God "Maybe I'm saying it wrong..."
Lucifer "Get rid of it."
God "Aw... Come on..."
Lucifer *Throws rock*
God "Aw... Don't... You rocked my orb! Gah, that is gonna screw up the whole atmosphere for, like, a long time... Maaan..."
Lucifer "You're a fucking crazy person. Don't talk to me."
God "Nah, hey, this is cool. We could do stuff like this with all the cages... Right... Ope... You're gone... Well.... I guess it's just me and the orb now...." *Zip*
God "I mean... They also kind of figure out the best way to eat each other... Like with traps or something... Generate poison in thier little goo sacks to... You know... eat each other better."
Lucifer "That... Is... Horrific..."
God "Right but, like, look at how big it's head is and how small it's arms are! Heheheheheheheh..."
Lucifer 😮 💨 "Oh man.... There is nothing good about that."
God "What do you mean!? Look at this guy! He can, like, not touch the ground for, like, a long as time. Check it. Flap flap flap! The guy is ridiculous man... And then it uses its feet claws to pin things down and/or grab and transport things so that it can pick them apart with it's bone face thing..."
Lucifer 😟
God "Maybe I'm saying it wrong..."
Lucifer "Get rid of it."
God "Aw... Come on..."
Lucifer *Throws rock*
God "Aw... Don't... You rocked my orb! Gah, that is gonna screw up the whole atmosphere for, like, a long time... Maaan..."
Lucifer "You're a fucking crazy person. Don't talk to me."
God "Nah, hey, this is cool. We could do stuff like this with all the cages... Right... Ope... You're gone... Well.... I guess it's just me and the orb now...." *Zip*
by Hym Iam February 16, 2023
Get the Cages mug.Lucifer "Back to the cage.... Oh, not THIS place again! What in the..."
God "Hey, look! I made a guy!"
Adam "Hello."
Lucifer "Oh great it talks-What in the hell is going on here!? You made a guy!? Why would you even-"
God "Yup. I made a guy. He's like us... Kind of. It's pretty good, man, I'm having him name all the stuff."
Lucifer "Great! Just great! You know there's an ethical-"
God "Hey, we're gonna go name some stuff, alright? See ya later!"
Lucifer 😮 💨 "..... Alright...."
*A few hours later*
Lucifer "Oh great... There's two of them..."
God "We're back! Man, that was fun! We named a bunch of stuff today."
Lucifer "Care to explain... That?"
God "Ooooh... Right. Yeah, Adam was saying that he gets a little lonely when I'm not around so... There. I made her out of one of his ribs."
Eve "Hello."
Lucifer 😮 💨 "So, what? Now he has an odd number of ribs?"
God "What? No. That would be stupid-"
Lucifer "AAAAHH!! OK! YUP! You're right! Why would I think that!? How could I have been so stupid!?"
God "It's ok but calm down you're gonna scare em."
Adam & Eve 😖
Adam "Snake!" 🫵
God "Ope! Ha! You're snake! That's hilarious!"
Lucifer "I'm not a snake..."
God "Well, this has been fun but I need a nap. Goodnight everybody!"
God "Hey, look! I made a guy!"
Adam "Hello."
Lucifer "Oh great it talks-What in the hell is going on here!? You made a guy!? Why would you even-"
God "Yup. I made a guy. He's like us... Kind of. It's pretty good, man, I'm having him name all the stuff."
Lucifer "Great! Just great! You know there's an ethical-"
God "Hey, we're gonna go name some stuff, alright? See ya later!"
Lucifer 😮 💨 "..... Alright...."
*A few hours later*
Lucifer "Oh great... There's two of them..."
God "We're back! Man, that was fun! We named a bunch of stuff today."
Lucifer "Care to explain... That?"
God "Ooooh... Right. Yeah, Adam was saying that he gets a little lonely when I'm not around so... There. I made her out of one of his ribs."
Eve "Hello."
Lucifer 😮 💨 "So, what? Now he has an odd number of ribs?"
God "What? No. That would be stupid-"
Lucifer "AAAAHH!! OK! YUP! You're right! Why would I think that!? How could I have been so stupid!?"
God "It's ok but calm down you're gonna scare em."
Adam & Eve 😖
Adam "Snake!" 🫵
God "Ope! Ha! You're snake! That's hilarious!"
Lucifer "I'm not a snake..."
God "Well, this has been fun but I need a nap. Goodnight everybody!"
by Hym Iam February 18, 2023
Get the Cage. mug.