ass wipe

a person who being or acting stupid in any type of way

"Stop being a ass wipe!"

by shesryda July 19, 2015

insurance wipe

The action of wiping after a clean poop thus insuring yourself of a clean balloon knot.

Sam: "Man i just wasted four squares of toilet paper!"
Devin: "What do you mean?"
Sam: "There was no poop on the toilet paper after I wiped."
Devin: "Well, then consider it an insurance wipe, you can never be too safe!"

by Bill Lowbiter March 2, 2014

Wayward Wipe

The accidental spreading of poop on your butt when wiping and not getting it fully removed.

Husband: I pooped but I think I had a wayward wipe because it still smells back there.
Wife: What is wrong with you?!?!

by Urban humor July 30, 2017

marker wipe

When you wipe, wipe, and wipe a hundred times, but theres still poop. Its like you’re wiping a marker.

Sorry I’m late, I had the marker wipes!

by Qslammer November 15, 2017

Bar Wipe

The classic spaghetti western-style saloon fight move when one wipes the bar down with another person (preferably face first), effectively cleaning the bar top of all inanimate objects.

Guy #1: "So did you knock that drunk dude out?"
Guy #2: "Nah, he was way too drunk so I just gave him the ol' Bar Wipe."

by Martyr0ne June 8, 2018

Razor Wipe

Toilet paper often located in public washrooms that shaves your butt hole while wiping it.

Dude that Mcdonald's bathroom has some serious razor wipe going on. I might have to by new underwear.

by officeworklife July 26, 2015

dick wipe

A brand of dispossible towels designed to be used to wipe your penis after a messy ejaculation when your lover is not allowing to suck excess semen from your face, and no blinds/bedclothes/curtians are at hand to fill this roll. Constructed from 100% cotton for that nice soft delicate penis wiping experience, and comes in a large range of aromatic and pleasing-to-the-nose smells...

''Aww shit, It's everywhere, Man I wish id bought a DICK WIPE

by James Foxhall May 13, 2005