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Crapstack Nessie

The art of having such an enormous bowel movement that when you stand up and examine it before you flush....the poop is sticking up out of the water.
Dude, I ate at White Castle last night and this morning I pulled off a Crapstack Nessie!!
by SuperDoops October 25, 2010
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Nessie watch

Being paid good money to do nothing and essentially waste one's life away.

Another term for this is "golden handcuffs".
Man, this job is akin to being paid to sit in a chair and be on the lookout for the loch Ness monster. Hence, Nessie watch.
by The_real_mr_fantastic September 28, 2019
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Slow Nessy

Someone who drives too damn slow on the highway.
"Damn, you are such a slow nessy! You are only doing 75mph in a 70mph zone"
by billith February 15, 2005
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Playing with Nessie

The act in which a man has sex with a
pregnant woman and the baby tries to play
with his dick.
(IN THE BREAKROOM AT WORK)

Dale: hey “Jim! why you walking like that?”
Jim: “Oh…I was up late Playing with Nessie.”
Dale: “Goddamn!”
Jim: “That'll probably be the last time since
my wife is due tomorrow.”
by Banana & Split June 11, 2022
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Drop a Nessie in the Loch

A euphemism for defecating inspired by the Loch Ness Monster. Similar to "dropping off the kids at the pool", yet with a Scottish flair.
Scotsman 1: Good gracious I had a lot to eat last night!

I've got to drop a nessie in the loch!

Scotsman 2: Sounds like a plan, laddie.
by Kamikaze Kool-Aid Man October 1, 2010
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Loch Nessie Messie

(noun)- a turd of mythical size. The base stays hidden in the bowl, while the head is the only thing that is seen. If you do not snap a picture of it....people may never believe it happened.

In addition to its length, circumference, and overall gargantuan stature, these often become what are also known as "bowl stainers." Leaving behind a mess that...well...isn't human.
Brother: Dude, I just took a two foot bowl stainer and no one was home to see it.

Other brother: I don't believe you.

Brother: Damn! Another Loch Nessie Messie....
by Lat 5 July 31, 2011
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hot messy nessy

When your homie smells like 3 day old bong water.
"Damn, Sharon over there smells like a hot messy nessy!"
by WeeedBear July 29, 2021
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