Normal work day, on a conference call, about to squeeze out a nice silent fart through an Aeron chair and surround myself with deadly aroma. At the last second, I noticed a slightly off center feeling in the sphincter, and induced a underwear-saving clench when I sharted a moment later. The experience really highlights how this is really a game of inches. Sure I coated the cheeks with some viscous mud, but that quick reaction saved me from free balling for the day. As a younger man, I doubt I would have possessed the intimate connection to and understanding I have for my body that prompted that clench. But today, following years of beers, beans, farts and conference calls, I'm really tuned in and avoided a perilous situation.
by choiceboards March 15, 2018
Get the Maturitymug. by SkSkSk Sk8er Grl December 15, 2019
Get the Maturemug. Experience is a matural teacher.
by Hercolena Oliver April 3, 2009
Get the maturalmug. by judochop January 5, 2009
Get the maturemug. n: A word reffering to the slow and painful process by which the human soul dies, and then proceeds to rot. This process ends when someone becomes fully mature, and are thus devoid of all joy and personality.
My dad represents maturity, he works 9 to 5 in a cubicle for 5 days a week. He also respects women, and never tells any racist or crude jokes. That poor bastard...
Mom: "You kids stop having fun this instant! Honestly, you need to be more mature."
Mom: "You kids stop having fun this instant! Honestly, you need to be more mature."
by X0cowbell0X January 24, 2011
Get the maturitymug. a person who is old enough to buy their own liquor and does not read their boyfriends emails and respond for him.
a person who frequently goes on their boyfriends email or msn or facebook and pretends to be him in order to have conversations with his friends is NOT mature.
by MatureGirl69 October 12, 2007
Get the maturemug. 