torqued out a Lincoln Log

When someone cranks out a prodigious-sized turd. Often accompanied by gasps of pain, but followed by a feeling of great physical and emotional relief.

Holy Shit! I just torqued out a Lincoln Log. I hope it doesn't stop up the toilet!

by You_Da_Monster September 5, 2011

The Lincoln log jammer

A sexual move where a man has a women shit on his dick and then jams his poop covered dick into said female's mouth while singing the national anthem.

Last night I did the Lincoln log jammer on Stacy she's still pissed at me.

by SirWoofen January 15, 2020

Abraham Lincoln log

When you shit in a girl's hand, and then she jerks you off.

Since I just ate Taco Bell, I figured it was the perfect time to receive an Abraham Lincoln log.

by H0RSE November 10, 2008

Abe Lincoln Log

Similar to and typically following it's predecessor the "Abe Lincoln;" this manuever is pulled off by adding the all-too popular "CLeveland Steamer" applied to the chin. Thus creating a makeshift adhesive "log" that any stragglers can stick to, creating a muddy beard.
To pull off the true beard style "NuttyMuddy Abe Lincoln Log" : Eat an adequate portion of crushed walnuts, peanuts, pinenuts, almonds, acorns or any variation thereof. At time of Cleveland Steam application,log should be a nice NuttyMuddy consistency

"My girlfriend didn't wax often onough. So, to teach her a lesson, I donkey-punched the bitch, shaved that shit, crapped and jacked off on her chin. Then, I shaved her snatch, spread her pubes on the cumlog. She had THE Abe Lincoln Log."

by 9100' High July 15, 2006

north carolina lincoln log

you drop trow, take a dump on your girls tits, and titfuck her with the shit

man, last night, i north carolina lincoln logged this chick i met at the club

by johnny someone January 9, 2009

Abra-Ham Lincoln Log

A guy that really likes ham and Lincoln logs. He was a president, for some reason. He might have gone to a play to show the biggest Lincoln log tower and it not falling over, and putting ham sandwiches between each piece and eating the ham sandwiches without it falling over. Then, John Walks Booth said that Lincoln didn't go through the walking booth. So John Walks Booth assassinated him, making the tower fall.

Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: AND TODAY I WILL EAT THESE HAM SANDWICHES!!!
John Walks Booth: Wait a minute! You didn't get a Walking Ticket from the Walking Booth!
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: I-I don't need one if I'm on stag-
John Walks Booth: I don't wanna hear it! "pulls out his glock"
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: WAIT WAIT WAIT, NO WE CAN WORK THIS OUT!! I'LL GET A TICKE-"Gets shot"
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log after dead: Damn It, I was gonna get the world record for most sandwiches eaten between Lincoln logs.

by AStrunkMan69 July 4, 2022

Linn County Lincoln Log

The act of deficating upon a female meth dealers chest in return for a discount on a gram in Linn County Missouri

Bobby... I saved myself $8 on this gram we're tweaking on by giving Teresa the ole Linn County Lincoln Log...she loves it!

by Uncle Eddie 985 August 22, 2025