theoretical thinker

its that one typa person who always asks the “what if?” questions. they look at the world in a more deeper way. they are more perceptive. they think about things on a deeper level.

i hate watching a movie with Emily
why?
because she’s such a theoretical thinker and can’t watch a movie with peace.

by thatonethot._v1 December 22, 2019

Actual Lives vs Theoretical Lives

To say "Dropping the nuclear bomb saved lives" is to weigh the actual lives lost against the theoretical lives that would have been theoretically lost and is to assume 1. That you can accurately predict how long the war was going to last and 2. You can accurately predict how many lives would have been lost.

Hym "Actual lives vs theoretical lives, Ben. You can't say that with any degree of ACTUAL certainty. Not intelligent and doing an incest cult doesn't make you better than everyone."

by Hym Iam April 29, 2024

theoretical bear

Not the bear everyone needs them to be

Mmmmmmm too bad he is only a theoretical bear

by Uptrash November 19, 2017

theoreticals

Something that you theoretically knows about from A to Z that you can even be quizzed about that (and can even teach children from parents other than yours about), but you're simply unable to practically apply it in real life, e.g. how to get more screen time from parents

I can explain the entire process of negotiating for more screen time to any kid, but when it comes to actually applying it with my parents, I'm just stuck in the realm of theoreticals!

by Emotional Cruiser October 1, 2025

Theoretical Spy

laggy spy main
also my dad

ay its theoretical spy, he gay af lmao

by insomniatf2brazil January 10, 2019

The person I would theoretically report it to

Already knew and her response to being told that they were fucking was "That's none of your business." But you wouldn't be saying that of the genders were swapped and the behavior of the higher-ups I would tell would indicate that THEY already knew. There was no one for me to tell, the people I would tell had it out for me, and I was fired for not doing it sooner.

Hym "The person I would theoretically report it to already knew. And this was not a business decision is was and is a publication made. I'm publishing papers. You are stealing it because is it better than anything you could manage to generate with your mentally retarded mind and for no other reason. THE ONLY BUSINESS DECISION BEING MADE HERE... Is the one to STEAL FROM ME! Those are the 2 decisions being made. One to steal from me and the other to allow it. If I can't get to one of you I CAN get to the other."

by Hym Iam September 24, 2025

Theoretical Billionaire

Literally me...

Hym "And I'm not a resentful taco delivery boy, Jordan. I'm a Theoretical Billionaire who looks like a Brazilian male model, is a genius, is one of the greatest writers of all time, and has rich grandparents "

by Hym Iam November 19, 2023