Scotch Pancake

Tall, slender type girls from the north (UK, Scottland) often with copper hair, long build, and relatively to absolutely fecking flat chested.

Did you see Martin's new bird and her big babs?

Nah mate, I'm more of a scotch pancake and leg man. Wouldn't mind a bit more breast-bone.

by Hossmann July 8, 2011

Pork Scotch Keys

A huge bunch of keys carried by little fat security guards because it makes them feel important. The only keys actually used are the ones to his house, his mum's house and his silly white van. The 58 others are ones he's found.

Look at that guy's keyring! He must own lots of houses and cars.

Wrong! What we have here is a cretinous security guard. They're only Pork Scotch Keys. He found most of them. Hasn't a bloody clue what they're for.

What a nobhead.

by benny twadge May 24, 2009

Pork Scotch music

The type of shit music played by fat old men at barbecues. The music is usually of South African origin and has a rhythm which the fat old man can't resist doing a gay dance to when he gets drunk on rum.

Monk: The barbecue's fine but why the shit music?

Mick: Its Pork Scotch music. The fat twat can't barbecue without it.

by flappy dickwad June 20, 2009

Man Scotch

Man Scotch: The action of aimlessly jumping from man to man, or relationship to relationship to fill a void in a female's heart or legs.

Guy A: Man, Lisa is really letting loose since her break up... That is the 3rd dude she banged this week...
Guy B: Yeah she is stuck in a perpetual game of Man Scotch...

by Failsh3d December 23, 2011

Scotch Fillet

A flaccid cock unable to achieve erection due to alcohol consumption.

Rhonda was so horny she couldn't wait for her boyfriend to get home to pound her cervix. However he drank too much partying and when he got home he had a Scotch Fillet. Rhonda settled for sucking on his wet noodle while she diddled herself.

by Eaton Holgoode May 25, 2015

Pork Scotch Pants

Disgusting tartan boxer shorts worn by boring old men and fat security guards. Usually unwashed and covered with shit stains.

Sweet Jesus what's that fat git wearing?

They're Pork Scotch pants. Vile aren't they?

by Flappy Dickwad May 5, 2009

Pork Scotch pizza

The world's finest pizza topping. The pizza of choice of fat security guards it consists of a Marguerita pizza topped with pork and gravy.

Why is that security guard so fucking fat?

You'd be fat if you ate 3 Pork Scotch pizzas every day.

by Lumpbag May 4, 2009