Hill biscuits

The vilest, sickliest and cheapest contents of a Snufbag. Officially classed as food but should never be consumed by humans. Ethiopians have been known to turn their noses up at these foul creations, choosing starvation instead.
Mickus: What's in this week's Snufbag?

Mum: A bag of crisps and 18 packets of Hill biscuits.

Mickus: OK, throw me the crisps and shove the shit down the bog where it belongs.
by Lumpbag April 26, 2009
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The flaming homosexual's response when someone says "I feel like I've run a marathon".
Exhausted person: I feel like I've run a marathon.

Shirtlifter: Its called Snickers now, Lovey!
by Lumpbag May 07, 2009
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Jafargholi

A Welsh Paki whose awful singing makes normal people vomit blood.
Flon: Dad, why did you just vomit blood?

Dad: Aaarghhhh! <points at television screen>

Flon: Shit, its Jafargholi! <vomits blood>
by Lumpbag May 26, 2009
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King of West Bridgford

Title adopted by a little fat twat who considers himself the most important person in his home town. The rotund monarch waddles slowly around wearing homosexual sandals, shorts and shades. His Queen is a repulsive dragon with teeth like surfboards. She doesn't understand a word you say because the massive weight of the teeth causes stress in the brain. The royal couple are universally despised and are frequently the victims of monkeyish pranks.
Flobule: Dad, what time are we going to Asda?

Dad: Don't know. I'll have to ask the King of West Bridgford. You need his permission to do things.

Flobule: That's right. We must respect our leader.
by Lumpbag May 29, 2009
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Pork Scotch pizza

The world's finest pizza topping. The pizza of choice of fat security guards it consists of a Marguerita pizza topped with pork and gravy.
Why is that security guard so fucking fat?

You'd be fat if you ate 3 Pork Scotch pizzas every day.
by Lumpbag May 04, 2009
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Goofy Granny Wagon

The worst type of Granny Wagon in the world. A shitty little red toilet on wheels driven by a hideous old gargoyle with teeth like green surfboards.
Sweet Jesus! A gargoyle driving a toilet!

Oh shit, its the Goofy Granny Wagon. Piss off you foul dentist dodger!
by Lumpbag August 16, 2009
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Porky-Talkie

A walkie-talkie carried by fat security guards.
Hey look at the fat guy with the walkie-talkie!

I think you'll find that's a porky-talkie. They're especially for fat ugly security guards like Pork Scotch.
by lumpbag June 09, 2009
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