Spank The Monkey

To stroke a black mandingo

Bianca: "Can I spank the monkey" *winks*
Ope: "wtf that's too much!"
Gurpreet: "But I can" *wink* *wink*

Ope: "... Come let's get a room "

by Bianca2019 April 5, 2019

spank the monkey

A fukn children's book you probably never heard of.

Y U freakin' out ppl, its just a book! "Spank the monkey lends a hand"

by xxdickyboyxx August 23, 2020

Spank the Monkey

A well known phrase, usually exclaimed in commentary when Clydebank FC's Nicky Little scores a goal

That is absolutely SPANK THE MONKEY from Nicky Little. That is disgusting!

by Doricbankie96 July 31, 2021

Not to Spank The Monkey

A way of saying not to beat around bush or I’m not bull shitting you.

Not to spank the monkey but you are really pretty.

by Skibidi D June 21, 2024

Eastern Monkey Spanking

The act of slipping your hand inside of her Asscrack and wobbling it all around until she takes a massive shit on your hand.

Jenna: Daddy Eastern Monkey Spank me!
Tom: Hold on Sommer Ray posted a booty pic!
Jenna: Fine all come to you

Tom: Eastern Monkey spank me first!
Jenna: You FAGWAG!
That is eastern Monkey spanking

by Meditation Papi March 14, 2019

Monkey spanker

A person who masterbates way too much.

Scott is the biggiest monkey spanker I no.

by Jon Simon December 15, 2002

south paw monkey spanker

One who uses his left hand to jack, whack, choke the chicken, spank the monkey, attack the one-eyed purple-headed warrior or in other words, MASTURBATE!

A lefty, per say

May be a person that writes, hits, or even smokes with his right hand but gallops the old lizzard with his left hand.

Also referred to as an S.P.M.P.

Kristine: So I used my teloscope last night and looked into Ray's window. Did you know that he is a South Paw Monkey Spanker?

Derek: So I applied for this new job at the Home Depot, and my boss wanted to know if I was an S.P.M.P. and I'm all wtf? On occasion, though, I do, do the five kunckle shuffle with 'ol Lefty!

Janet: Hey Bobby?
Bobby: Yes Janet?
Janet: Do you participate in genital stimulation via phallengetic motion with your left hand?
Bobby: Why yes, I am an S.P.M.P.!

by Emas Diez May 9, 2006