Defensive Consultant

A hockey player who is overpaid to stand in a defensive position without any tangible results.

Wade Redden was a $6.5M defensive consultant for the NY Rangers who was sent to the minors after inflecting years of pain.

by keepyourheadup May 22, 2011

Defensive Dialing

The act of pulling out your cell phone after seeing someone you know but want to avoid conversing with them. The hope is that they see that you are busy on your phone, so they decide they shouldn't approach you. This must be done before the person notices that you in fact, saw them first.

I saw my old neighbor outside while I was checking the mail today. I pulled out my cell phone and started defensive dialing so that I wouldn't have to get stuck talking to him for the next 10 minutes.

by Deadinlivingform October 10, 2011

Defensive Daniel’s

Daniel Defense fanboys who simp for the company regardless of their bootlicking roots

Everyone: I don’t understand why these Defensive Daniel’s cuck so hard for a mid tier rifle like they’re some tier 1 operators

Defensive Daniels: OMG but muh MK18 is gonna help me look so good across my Hawaiian shirt in the boogaloo

by Daddy's Hard Candy April 8, 2023

Canadian Defensive

Similar to the Roman War Helmet, except you put your anus on their nose, place your balls on their chin and let your penis extend down their throat.

Brendan passed out early, so I gave him the ol' Canadian Defensive.

by Bryan November 19, 2004

Defensive

Defensive is no matter how many fights you try to pick with somebody, you always say you're the one fighting back. You're always David, the other guy is always Goliath, no matter what lead up to the incident.

The girl was defensive, but still expected to be treated as human. When you're defensive, the other guy isn't human, therefore why should you be. Defensive is the belief that you don't deserve to suffer as much as everyone else. Defensive is the assumption that you're the only one being pushed.

by Solid Mantis December 6, 2020

Defensive Shopping

Buying presents for acquaintances out of fear they might surprise you with a gift.

"Great!" I'll have to start my defensive shopping tonight after work. I have a bad feeling Peggy's gonna surprise me with one of those sweaters she loves to knit for Christmas.

by Adam (______) The Person December 21, 2008

Defensive Screen look

When a person looks at your screen in Splitscreen Multiplayer to avoid being killed.

Paul was going to sneak up and knife John in MW2 but he Defensive Screen looked and turned around and killed him!

by CH4OS October 5, 2011